Category: Uncategorized

A kid would love to run around in a prison. There is nothing inherently prison-like about prison. The prison is because of the fact that you cannot leave that place, so that place becomes a prison.

So in an abstract sense, anything that you cannot move away from/or change, is a prison. This can apply to just about anything. Anything can become a prison, the only condition being, that you cannot move away from it. Positive or negative and other value judgments are irrelevant here, because no matter what, anything can become a prison if that is imposed. So any imposition is a prison.

Synonymous words would be: Limitation, Restriction, Attachment, Trappedness, Stuckness, Stifling, Constricting etc.

What is there is there, you either have control, or do not have control. If you have control, use it. If you do not have control, then what is there to complain/blame? If the situation does not work for you, its your responsibility to get yourself to a situation suitable for you. If you see no way out, then you must wait for clarity (something you do not have control over). Then what is there to complain or blame?

Why should someone choose to stay in the prison, when the door is wide open? And keep complaining about the prison, instead of simply getting up and walking out? That is the unconsciousness. The unconscious keeps one in a situation, and the conscious complains about it unconsciously. Because if you truly knew you have no control, why would you complain. Does anyone complain about the sky being blue?

Every human being or living thing could be said to be a certain kind of breath of life/adventure.

How do I create expectations about the future of what’s going to happen?
Based on past experiences? But relying on past experiences as a predictor for the future is playing into the same self-perpetuating fractal.

For example, if you believe deep down you are unworthy, then that fractal is working unconsciously under your nose towards creating a story from your life that would prove this back to you. Like if you met someone and had a good time, you would still be insecure. The next time you meet them, you would start testing them, asking all kinds of questions to prove you own case. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Since all of reality is basically our interpretation, if you construct a powerful story that proves they rejected you, aha! you proved it. The more intelligent the person, the more subtle and fantastic story they can come up with. But ultimately the intellect was just a servant of the belief that was trying to prove itself. That is the pattern of the belief, it will play itself forever.

The game between intellect and belief is like, to give an analogy, the intellect is like the painter and belief is like the master of the painter. The master says ‘Paint me a landscape, but only use the colors black and brown’. The painter is like ok!, Better the painter, more the detail and awesomeness of the landscapes. But ultimately he was just following the higher instruction coming from the master, to use only the colors brown and black. So no matter what paintings come out, they are all possible combinations of brown and black.

Similarly, our reality can be a recursive spiral/fractal of the same emotions of fear, guilt, rejection and it can create entire intricate worlds. It might even be unimaginable to think of alternative worlds, because you have made so much of intricate investment in creating those worlds. But completely different worlds (paintings) can be created with much better emotions (equanimity, peace, love, joy, celebration, ecstasy) and the intellect would use all its power to paint according to the new beliefs driving it.

Sometimes the more intelligent the person, the more convincing they sound, because their stories are so much more intricate, detailed, connected and the relationships between elements are very complex. This complexity can absorb the listeners mind so much, they might very easily lose sight of the fundamental core-beliefs driving this whole castle like creation.

Entire kingdoms of guilt-fear paradigms would vanish if the underlying belief structure is seen through.

So the 4 main attention hijacks in my life are:
Survival, Sexual/Eros feelings, Other people with expectations, My dreams/beliefs/vision.

1. Survival need makes me seek – Security, Food, Water, Avoidance of physical threats (and harm), Avoidance of pain, Avoidance of loss.
(Mind Free from primitive/primal needs——-<spectrum>——-Mind seized by primitive/primal needs)
Chakras: 1

2. Sexual/Eros/libido/pleasure energy makes me seek – status, power, prestige, respect, love/wantedness/desirability, achievement, praise, admiration, beauty, passion
Spectrum: (Happiness/Pleasure ——–<spectrum>———- Depression/Anhedonia)
Chakras: 2,4

3. Other people’s expectations makes me seek – acceptance, belonging, peace, harmony (states of flow), cooperation, trust, identity, security of relationships, stability of relationships, meaning from relationships
Spectrum: (Coherence, purpose, stability, openness ——- Fragmentation, confusion, chaos, narrowness) 
Chakras: 3

4. My dreams/beliefs/vision make me seek – truth (enlightenment), higher knowledge/understanding, intellect, expression, freedom, novelty(exploration, curiosity), higher purpose, higher vision, true identity, ultimate meaning, transcendent (God).
Spectrum: (Enlightenment/Knowledge————Delusion/Ignorance)
Chakras: 5,6,7

Hijack of attention because of survival needs: (insecurity, anxiety)
Even the things I need to do for survival is a motivation hijack.

Attention hijack –  Chakric activity: (sensation mappings to mood/thoughts)
For example, if there is strong sensation in the sexual organs, then I put all my attention there.
Another example would be a hollow uncomfortable sensation in the solar plexus chakra. Again all attention goes there and the sensation content consumes consciousness.
It becomes a loop, because the more that sensation captures my consciousness. Subsequently there is the part of, what I do with the sensation, which is related to the dopamine system fractals.
The dopamine system abstract algo/fractal is like:
If there is ‘X’ sensation in ‘X’ Chakra, do ‘X1-X2-X3-X4….’

When alone attention hijack happens because of thinking about what the immediate people in my life expect from me.

Attention hijack also happens to me based on expectations of the environment I am in. This again comes back to people, a people created system of reinforcement/conditioning and training.

Another attention hijack is my own perceived problems.
It grips my attention proportional to the intensity of the problem.

Another attention hijack is a future event expectation of pleasure.
It could be a new item I ordered, it could be the visit of some person I’m looking forward to see OR the most exciting would be some kind of new crush/sexual encounter.
Here in this case, that thought consumes all of my attention, and I am constantly fantasizing about it and imagining the kind of feeling I could get from it.
I cannot think of anything else at that time, because that would change my state, and I feel a great affinity/attraction/attachment to the pleasure state.
Once I have pleasure, all I want to do is pull on with whatever the stimulus activity was, and I have no drive to shift away from it. If circumstances force me to shift, I’ll be very heartbreaking to let go of the pleasure state. I use this all the time infact. Not only for eros stuff but also for reading an interesting article, anything that I have an inherent interest, curiosity, drive, passion for.

I dance to express.
I sing to express.
I write to express.
I draw to express.
All my movement is expression.
All my thought is an expression.
All my action is an expression.
Everything is an expression of this
Mysterious energy which I am.

Everything inside me moves
By a mysterious force which I am.

This shimmery ever-changing ecstatic reality
Is always accessible to me.

I can always cover up this reality though
This open experience, by holding on.
Everything I hold on to, conscious or unconscious
Is the reason why I do not experience the nirvana freedom.

There are endless fractals perpetuating themselves
At varied levels from Grossest to the Subtlest.
I now see myself out of most of them.

The more I let go and see, I can see
That I can get lost in my own acts.

Why will I voluntarily let myself get lost?
For the fun of it?
For the adventure of it?
For the experience of it?

Why would I ever want to experience getting lost
In my own creations? And Suffer?
Just for the experience of suffering?
So that I can experience the hidden aspects more gloriously?

When they are revealed to me?
This is like a hide and seek game
I play with myself
I hide from my power, and imagine I’m weak
Just for the experience

And then I go BOO!
And I have the power back again
What a relief it is
What a joy it is
To see I have never lost THAT

I play this game endlessly
Of hide and seek with myself
Because it is so entertaining

I endlessly discover my hidden aspects
I endlessly keep finding myself
I can do this endlessly because
I am infinite

All belief created realities are equivalent when seen in their totality just like all movies are equivalent in their totality. So if I’m trying to find truth IN THE MOVIE, I just find the truth of the movie contents, but when the movie changes, then again, the contents change and I find the truth of the new movie.

But the real transcendent truth is beyond the movies(Appearances). The real truth, is the one taste, the one unifying substance of all belief created realities (of all of reality itself). The movies may have recurring themes of varying abstractness, but the transcendent truth unifies all of the movies.

The transcendent truth is independent of the specific movie appearing on the screen. It is the quality of ‘MOVIENESS’ itself which applies to all of the movies appearing no matter what.

The energy of creation is Love.

The energy of manifestation movement is Love. (Note: Manifestation is movement in duality, no movement = no manifestation of anything whatsoever)

Love energy = Creation, Gain

Loss of Love = Removal, Depression, Loss

The will to do something, even the will to live, is a manifestation of ‘Love energy’.

When this love energy is lost, it is felt as depression and all your creations(devoid of love now) become a burden to you.

Just like absence makes presence fonder, the loss of love sharpens the perception of love itself (just like you can see light the most only when you emerge from darkness).

In other words, all manifestation is out of love i.e. a spontaneous creative act.

If that is the case,

– Suffering experience is from a love for suffering

– Pain experience is from a love for pain

– Defiance is from a love for defiance

Similarly, love for torture, love for laziness, love for hate, just about any negative thing you can come up with has the energy of love/creation driving it.

Love is the energy driving ALL OF THE MANIFEST. The concept is transcendent. It is something like the concept of presence. There is only presence and absence is also a kind of presence only ‘the presence of absence’. Similarly, love is the energy behind all movement in the experience field, call it -ve, +ve, its irrelevant.

What you love, you become. Its just a matter of time. See beyond the time dimension and its clear they both are ONE THING. You are already your desire/what you love.

The ‘becoming’ illusion is a transformation that happens in time.  Its like solid becomes liquid and then becomes a gas as we heat it. The substance has changed form, but it is still the same essential substance right no matter what the form – solid, liquid or gas?. This is something similar. Similarly here, potential –> Kinetic energy is a transformation we see in time, but when seen outside the time dimension, they both are ONE. Your potential/desire/what you love is EXACTLY what you will eventually become. Things may appear to stop this process, but for how long, this potential energy when given the opportunity will convert itself to kinetic becoming. You ALREADY ARE your desire if seen from a perspective transcendent of time.