Your compliments and criticisms

Every compliment you give,
Is more about you than the other.
It is,
# What you chose to see.
# How much you chose to see.
# How you chose to see.

Conversely, the same would apply,
To the criticisms you give too.
They too indicate,
# What you chose to see.
# Much much you chose to see.
# How you chose to see.

Your internal and external lives are reflections of each other

Balanced internal life = Balanced external life.
Extreme internal life = Extreme external life.
Total internal awareness = Total external awareness
Internal extreme tunneled investments = External extreme tunneled investments.
Internal imbalances => reflected in the external as external imbalances.

Many extreme people view relationship as:
Conflict, Resistance, Strife, War, Violence, Pain.
The problem here is of degree and not of essence.
Like if I take a knife and ever so gently graze your skin, it will feel scintillating.
But if I do it with more force, it will cut the skin, sharply hurt, and leave a bruise.
So the problem in the latter case was simply the intensity.

In a world filled with limitation of various degrees,
If we try to do things with unlimited passion,
Either we will break or the thing will break.
Relationships are a limited possibility.
It has a certain place, a certain potential,
After which it will start to hurt and pain more and more.
This kind of violence can be addictive too,
Because it is controlled by you.
I would think this is a similar reason,
Why people cut themselves.
Because it is a pain that you can control and administer to yourself.
So by fighting with people, even if it hurts, you are controlling it.
And that might give a relief at a different level.
You could similarly, subject yourself to controlled mental pain too,
Say by researching on all sorts of painful topics,
Because then you are in control, you are subjecting yourself to it.

Generally what happens is a full cycle.
The person is maybe highly sensitive,
And was subjected to physical, relational, or mental violence.
Again the violence here is because of degree, and not essence.
Like if a blind person high five’s you on the nose by mistake.
High five is a cool thing, on your hands, but not on your nose.
So, then the person in later life,
In order to regain a sense of control,
May subject himself to the same abuse and recreate those feelings.
The huge difference in the second run of those feelings is that,
He inflicts them upon himself, so that gives him back his sense of control,
And allays the fear, paranoia, and expectation.

The merger of tech and the human mechanism

As technology evolves,
It will start to merge more and more with our senses.
For instance, take the case of technology of the screen.
Its evolution moved from large CRT monitor screens to phone screens today.
Something even more intimate than phone screens is the AR or VR screen.
Even here there is a finer evolution happening.
Today we have VR headsets like the Oculus Rift which have 1080×1200 per eye.
But if you notice the mechanism of the eye,
The small area at the central portion of the field is the clearest and of highest resolution.
The rest of the peripheral part is at much lower resolution.
So, now they are working on VR headsets with 2 screens,
Where one screen is the high resolution background and the other is a tiny screen of much higher resolution that moves with the eye.
So this is an example of how the screen tech is slowly merging with the mechanism of our eyes itself.
The next step even beyond this logically would be to start to directly tap into the visual cortex in the brain itself.
Because the eye really is only a window that brings in information to the visual cortex.
If we could directly pass the information to the visual cortex, I would assume it would be indistinguishable from the real eye’s input.
In fact with directly passing input to the visual cortex, we could even have far more colorful rich and clear vision (like what is experienced on some psychedelics with the amplification of sensory circuits).
Technology would move merge into the senses, and then move into the brain circuits.

I am interested in extreme experiences

I am interested in extreme experiences,
Internally or externally induced,
Experiences that give me liberation, powers, freedom,
Experiences that release or change the spell I find myself in now,
Experiences that convey and indubitably prove to me,
The emptiness and freedom inherent in the field.
When something is changed,
Freedom from that thing is straightaway proved.

Writing is my ultimate expression of free will

Writing is my creative freedom,
Writing is how I feel my free will,
Writing is how I express my deepest truth,
Writing brings me great fulfillment and satisfaction,
That is unsurpassed and unparalleled.
Writing is the fruit that comes out of my psyche tree.
Writing frees/releases me from whatever I write,
Making space for new content to emerge,
Like the effulgence of a fountain.

The real solution to anything

Solving things is irrelevant.
The real solution is always dissolution.
The real solution to anything is the transcendence of that thing.
Where the problem is subsumed and swallowed,
Into a higher space/context within you that is awakened.
The problem-solution paradigm exists in darkness,
Once the light is brightened, it all vanishes into the light.
Like how when you wake up from sleep, the dream vanishes.
Like how all the ghosts simply disappear once sunlight shines.

Venusian Lifestyle

New age, tarot, massage, gemstones, crystals, incense/sage, reiki, energy healing, channeling, tantra, divine gods/goddess/angels, necklaces, bracelets, rings, earrings, fancy seductive baroque decorative attractive colorful cloth loose dresses, carpets, artifacts, psychic, acupressure/acupuncture, affirmations/prayers, love yourself mantras, loving and celebrating the body, arts, transformation, kundalini, yoga, sanctuary, retreat, hippie, focus on expressing one’s nature, self-expression, aesthetics, festivals, music, dancing, singing, chanting, paintings, rituals, group eros, feeling, free love, romance, yoni/lingam, sacred feminine/masculine, celebrations, flowers/fruits, beautification, decorations, psychedelic art, trances/intoxications/dionysian ecstasies, releasing inhibitions/freeing oneself, intimacy/bonding/uniting, meditation, fire, tribal/communities, candles, moonlight, spirits, renaissance, greek, green, heart chakra.