About me: I am an EXPERIENCE EAGLE

Journey to the Abstract

Flying-Eagle
I am an EXPERIENCE EAGLE.
Its a symbolism, metaphor – to the physical eagle.
The experience eagle wanting freedom to fly to any territory it feels like (across time and space).

Each person and obligations is like me(i.e. the eagle) tied to a certain location in time and space. He cannot fly far away from that place since it has to come back to fulfill the obligations. Certain potentials of experience are not available because they are too far from where he is and he cannot leave his attachments and get there. Like there is an attachment to the ‘potential’ plane of manifestation of existing as a body itself.
This explains his longing for FREEDOM of EXPERIENCE.

So this eagle explores various territories of experiences and does great things in each area that he touches due to his sharp vision. But he cannot hold on to everything. He knows internally…

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What is the difference between sex and love!

original-abstract-art-paintings-by-osnat-colorful-abstract-painting-454702

What philosophies do you want to have sex with?
What personality structures do you want to have sex with?
What thoughts/ideas/concepts do you want to have sex with?
What emotions do you want to have sex with?
What bodies do you want to have sex with?
Which music do you want to have sex with?
Which sights/pictures/images do you want to have sex with?
What potentials of life do you want to have sex with?
Which forms/objects of life do you want to have sex with?

I see sex = love, the same thing.
Making love to something = Having sex with something.
Colloquially, sex is referred to the physical act of penetration of genitals between 2 opposite sexes.
The other physical parts are called different things – making out, kissing, caressing, touching.
It’s just an INSAAAAAAANNNNEELY NARROW definition.
Every energy in the universe is having sex at all levels.
Ultimately we are having sex with life itself – all the time.
Shiva and Shakti are the ultimate lovers wrapping around like our DNA strands.

Analog and Digital Reality Experience are 2 poles of the same LIFE ENERGY

The analog reality and digital reality are 2 poles of the same magnet.
Analog reality = Direct experience (What you are actually seeing through the Goggles)
Digital reality = Thoughted/thinged experience (Goggles through which you are seeing)
These 2 poles go together.
If you see a lot, you can always “thing everything” you see into a higher digital quantization.
You can experiment with various levels of digital quantization.
You can even just say: Everything is THAT, in which case the quantization number is just 1.
Else you can break it down into 1000s of levels.
Both appear together as potentials – from one energy – I could call LIFE.
LIFE gives me the freedom to see UNITY ———————–MULTIPLICITY as a spectrum and slot my experience anywhere inbetween as I please.
Just like the TRUE ———————— FALSE spectrum.
Wider the spectrum, more the joy of the TRUE side.

So how many dimensions are there? What map will you use for the territory?
Well there are millions of maps and seeing the territory through each map is a different experience too.
That’s called multiple frames.
Its quite enjoyable to traverse various frames like watching 1000s of new movies even if the characters and set are same.
So abandoning frame changing is not a solution.
Infact it is not possible to abandon it at all, you will only end up with some other fixed frame and lower consciousness (lessen change).
Instead move into GREATER change, more minute, more subtle, more inclusive/expansive/whole.
When life reaches a certain intensity, you will fall into the formless world.
All achievement is also within a frame.
So when the frame changes, the achievement becomes meaningless and void too.
Its like you have shifted to a parallel universe/world.

Ultimately all anger is about desires

Ultimately all anger is about desires.
We are angry at all the reasons because of which our desires are not being met.
Now call one ‘good’ and the other ‘evil’. Does it matter which formation pervades? Creation or destruction?
It is a war.
Until there is transcendence of some kind, there is only war.
Until a perspective is reached that embraces both, there is war.
Ultimately each one wants to convert the other to himself or include the other.
But stuff like creation and destruction, good and bad, are inherently contradictory, and therefore inclusion of the other will destroy the original perspective.
If you think of yourself as ‘something’, there is invariably going to be war.
Whether that something is good or bad is a matter of perspective.
It is a something you have identified with.
Removal of cathexis from all perspectives/points of view/desires, makes one empty, He can now take on any point of view/any formation/any identity, if desired.
When one is free of identifying with the formation (any formation/something), then one is identified with the field instead, and can move into any formation in the field.
It is like being free of gravity. Free of the gravity that holds and binds your experience down to this identity alone.
Its like a guy who does not call himself Indian, American, Filipino etc. gets the passport to all countries. But if he calls himself an Indian etc. he only gets the Indian passport and can only visit other somewhat agreeable countries very briefly (tourist visa).

Thoughts – Aug 1

The Greatest fear is LOSS.
PAIN usually accompanies – the process of loss.
In a sense, if I see both as verbs, then PAIN = LOSS.
Because as loss is happening there is pain.
Also, what is loss for one person, is not a loss for the other.
What matters is loss of what is desired and loved.
This is again different for each person (each a universe) and it just IS, it cannot be understood, so it is absurd in a sense.

Pain is when an undesirable reality replaces a desirable reality.
If it is all a single screen appearance of consciousness, then the undesirable reality replacing the desirable reality is loss of the desirable reality.
So pain and loss are connected and it is ultimately degrees of loss of ‘what is loved’.

So if nothing/infinite is loved, then all its expressions are loved and no-thing is loved, rather the whole field is loved, so all its appearances are loved. So death is not a loss then.
There is only changing experience and one loves the field.
This is the journey from loving somethings’ to loving nothing(field).

Pleasure is felt when – what you want is increased against what you do not want.
Pain is felt when – what you do not want is increased against what you want.
So its all relative.
But what you want at any moment also changes, so its quite mysterious. Each person wants different things too at each time.
That is why pain for one person can be pleasure for the other and vice versa.
What you want is also constantly changing, and it is fundamentally absurd and mysterious.

All emotions are libido in a way.
When emotions are high, libido is high too.
Intense emotions like anger and fear, can be easily converted into libido.

If the nature of everything is God, the instantaneous infinite experience field manifesting instantaneously NOW, then there are no processes, learning, suffering has no value, no growth – nothing.
Everything is a dream. Everything is an appearance. Everything can change. All substance is an appearance too. The vibration can simply move higher and obliterate the whole manifest and create something ENTIRELY NEW in an instant.
Then the value of all experience, is the experience itself, it is the NOW of it.
There is no intrinsic value in memory either, unless you choose to.
Its all a dream. There is infinite memory.
Ultimately you experience, the appearance contents (appear to be remembered) in your conscious field which can expand and contract.

Like Yin/Yang, Heaven/Hell, Pleasure/Pain, Construction forces/Destruction forces, Growth/Decay – There are infinite ways to feel pain, just as there are infinite ways to feel pleasure. Infinite things can go wrong (disharmony) just as infinite things can go right (harmony).

There is only experience ultimately.
And you are the ultimate power.
You will let go of an experience only when you are done with it.
Fully experiencing “whatever experience is” is the only thing.

What we are scared of is the UNKNOWN EXPERIENCE.
Like say you met an alien, and you tune into the alien’s being, and this process disintegrates your entire mind and body to a faster vibration causing your ENTIRE experience to change. Would this not be terrifying?

Egoic energy is running out

I am fundamentally running out of egoic energy in every form.
All intellection, thought, practices, even the finest ones which “I DO” is resistance against ‘What Is’.
In fact intellection and thought is subtle energy, it requires imposing control on mental frames which is really tiresome.
All “doing” is resistance against ‘What Is’ – from the subtlest to the grossest doing.
What is running out is this separate self/egoic energy.
I have exhausted my tank of imposing my will on ‘What IS’ or struggling/resisting ‘What IS’.
Even the subtlest imposition of will on ‘What IS’, is resistance against the tide.
It is like movement against an existing medium, like walking in water, or swimming.
At times, I feel less resistance from the medium relatively when there is “higher energy” but when “energy reduces” there is higher resistance felt.
It all comes down to “control” again. Are you controlling experience? In any form?.
All control is invariably resistance, because it is imposing a will on a medium, and the medium does offer resistance no matter what.
Reality is forever eluding my concepts/understanding about it, no matter how rich, vast, complex or incredible my models might be.
It takes energy to uphold concepts/understanding/imposition of frames. And this is precisely the energy that is running out. I can nowadays only hold frames for a few hours at a time.
After that, the energy runs out, I go back into a sort of obliviousness, but when I come back, a different frame appears and I hold that for the next time period, and so on.
Reality is infinite, boundless and mysterious.
“Infinite” in a noun form is analogous to “boundless”
“Infinite” in a verb form is analogous to “mystery”.
As each day passes, my learning paradoxically is about how “I don’t know”.
This unknowing is instilled in me at finer and finer levels as each day passes.
There are so many fine grades and levels of this seeing of unknowing.

What we love is only the life force

Entry and filling – and departure and vacating – of life force.
What we really love is the life force and nothing else.
The life force is synonymous with mystery, change, freedom, vibration, riches and intensity.
So life and death is the [arising, filling and passing] of life force.
It’s a dance between 2 – Awareness and Aliveness.
Aliveness [arises/emerges, fills and passes/dissolves] within Awareness.
This is the package or game of life and death, which happens by the waxing and waning of aliveness[beloved] within awareness.

The material realm and other laws and cycles including the wake, dream, sleep cycle etc. form the base of the aliveness appearance.
Aliveness, along with this base material appearance, also provides many other form and formless realms as possibilities.
When aliveness is at its high point, it provides the greatest riches and freedom.
When aliveness is at its lowest point, one feels completely bound and mechanized by the tyranny of all the laws, losing all possibilities and freedom.
Finally when aliveness fully vacates it ends the duality with awareness and sinks back into awareness causing deep sleep.