Author: perceptionflow

– DN is basically a flooding of repressed material into consciousness, so that it can be seen, accepted, understood, seen as your potential, as you, and then released.

– So if life is constantly driving you to feel things which you repressed or don’t want to feel, then all the energy gets consumed in resistance so that you do not feel the repressed material.

– You end up being in a lifeless, stoic state and struggle to hold on to it, to prevent yourself from being consumed with all the repressed/unpleasant stuff.

– So this explains the dark night experience. Its when the contents of consciousness become the repressed material and this can happen to anybody trying to transform.

– The way out is to give out all your love for all the material arising, so that those energetic traps can be released.

Other people are my own consciousness.

So their emotions, are emotions in my consciousness.

My non-acceptance of their emotions –> actually means non-acceptance of those emotions in my consciousness.

In a way, their anger is ‘Anger in consciousness’.

My anger or their anger is ultimately the same –> i.e. both are appearances in my consciousness.

What I repress or avoid in others, is by nature, what I am repressing and avoiding in myself too.

This is because if I do not want ‘X’ in my consciousness then not only would I not allow myself to experience ‘X’, I would also not allow the other’s display of ‘X’ to make me feel ‘X’.

For example: Say you repress anger. Then firstly you would not allow yourself to feel angry. Secondly, even if someone displays anger at something, you would not allow anger to arise in yourself inspite of your witnessing of that person’s display. In other words, you are not really seeing that person’s emotion at all and you dont want to really see it, because it is the very thing you have repressed in yourself. You would dissociate with that person’s anger and stay stoic or something. Now if that person’s directs his anger towards you, then you would have to put greater effort to repress your own anger arising as a reaction, and this repression would require a very strong dissociation. Maintaining this dissociation takes up a lot of resistance and is therefore suffering, since Resistance = Suffering.

When it comes to other people:

Their sadness, is ‘Sadness in consciousness’.

Their sadness or my sadness is again the same – both are equivalent appearances in consciousness.

Based on what the contents of our consciousness are, like anger, sadness (whether endogenous or observed in other people), we either accept(love) or reject(hate).

What we call unconscious, is essentially what you have repressed or hated so much, you have pushed it out of your consciousness. When encountered with repressed material, we either fight hard, resist or avoid it to push it away.

Ultimately both fight and flight have the same purpose. To get the non-accepted repressed part out of your consciousness.

The villian is heroically non-heroic

The hero is villanously non-villanous.

You can be arrogantly humble

You can be humbly arrogant

You can be wickedly right or rightfully wicked.

You can be fundamentally non-fundamentalist OR non-fundamentally fundamentalist

You can be violently peaceful or peacefully violent

You can desire desirelessness OR not desire desire

You can project lovely hate, or hateful love

You can relaxedly struggle OR strugglefully relax

You can walk the path of no-path OR walk the non-path of path

You can become ‘being’, or be ‘becoming’

And so on…

There is no ‘phenomenal object’ or ‘observation object’ that cannot be seen as yourself (i.e. the same as the eyes of love). This includes all kinds of pain, suffering, agitation, every possible humiliation and negative experience, and so on. Because ultimately everything is an appearance in consciousness.

All appearances are me, and I am the mysterious/unknowable force that moves everything.

From the transcendent viewpoint, this is exactly what I want.

In that level of seeing, my creative principle becomes the creative principle of the entire universe, my will becomes God’s will, my intelligence becomes God’s intelligence, I become one with God, I become God. I AM ‘THAT’.

That mysterious unmanifest force is me, along with all of the manifest, which is also me.

The manifest is a very very small part of me.

But I sometimes choose to forget my vastness just to experience limitation and explore one of my possibilities.

This helps me renew the appreciation for who I am, by the duality principle.

The more limitation you experience, the more you can appreciate your vastness, when you go back.

This entire manifest is one of my infinite possibilities.

The rest of the infinite infinite possibilities are the unmanifest (potential for manifest possibilities).

The true experience of being GOD, can only be had after experiencing limitation, because it is the limitation that illuminates the experience of the infinite. And it is the infinite that illuminates the experience of being limited.

Because if you were really limited, you would not even know you are limited. If you were really infinite, you would not even know you are infinite. The 2 experiences mutually create each other and mutually illuminate one and other by the principle of duality.

If God did not play this game, there would be no experience at all. Just ZERO, NOTHING and it would not be possible to experience this NOTHING, because NOTHING needs a SOMETHING to contrast it to be NOTHING. So all experience can only happen in duality/contrast. So the experiences are duality dreams played by God, for his own entertainment, enjoyment, and for playing with his infinite creativity and possibilities.

I let go of all people and things,

That need my effort to be with me.

If it is just my act or effort,

That makes people or things come to me or be with me

Then I let them go.

If people or things come to me effortlessly,

If they are naturally attracted to my effortless essence (my true essence),

I embrace them, witness them, understand them, BE with them, love them.

But I do not seek anything or anyone, with my act or effort.

Something/Someone that requires my effort to be attracted to me,

Is not really loving me, but only loving my effort/act.

I remain in my effortlessness, and drop all effort.

I welcome everything that is naturally attracted to my essence.

Just like a flower.

The flower simply stays open and vulnerable,

but does not seek to make people look at it/admire it/love it,

By tricks, acts, deceptions, manipulations.

The flower does not expect anything from anyone,

All it gives out is its true intrinsic effortless essence,

Radiating it outwards to anyone who SEES it, truly sees it as it is.

It remains in its nature, and people who are really present with it

See its utmost beauty and tenderness

While others who are preoccupied in the clouds of their ego

Simply pass by without noticing the flower

I am this open vulnerable flower.

I remain as I am, in my effortless nature.

WHAT I WANT – Desires/Needs/ID

WHAT SHOULD BE – Superego/Morals

ARBITER, DECISION MAKER/EXECUTIVE – Ego/Decider/Action

When the ego/self/personality structure does not integrate the ID and superego, there is internal strife.

If the super-ego is too large – there is inhibition by guilt, other-centered martyr. May get exploited.

If the ID is too large – there is the asshole, self-centered bully. May exploit.

Since the ego is the arbiter, the ego will notice it gets hijacked by guilt (super-ego) while the neglected part screams. Similarly the ego can also notice if it gets hijacked by desires and the neglected morals would scream back.

If the super-ego entirely dominates – we will have a perfect martyr personality, excessive empathy, entirely other focused.

If the ID entirely dominates – we will have a psychopath, 0 empathy, entirely self-confused.

So it seems like, the ego (which is vilified in other spiritual contexts) actually in this model, serves an integrating function, a harmonizing function in consciousness. So we need to have an extremely capable and strong ego that can integrate both the entire Super-ego(morality, empathy) and the entire ID (unconscious) and maintain a beautiful music and harmony between them.

(infinite superego, ideals)+ve infinity —————Ego(arbiter)————— -ve infinity(infinite unconscious)

(consciousness, knowledge, understanding, coherence)Light———–(Ego)————–Darkness(unconsciousness, unknown, mystery/wonder, chaos)

The Yin-Yang dance.

Its just like a pendulum.

Movement to one side simultaneously creates the potential to swing to the other side and vice versa.

Another way to imagine this is to think of it as a spectrum analyzer in your music system.

Lets say the high point is the +ve experience and the low point is the -ve experience.

Each of the below can be columns in this spectrum analyzer shown.

The overall experience that then unfolds moment to moment is MUSIC.

What is the music of your life?

Truth ———————————– False

Clarity ———————————- Confusion

Light ———————————– Dark

Gain ———————————– Loss

Meaning ——————————- Meaninglessness

Pursuit ——————————— Avoidance

Zest ———————————— Tiredness

Vigor ———————————– Exhaustion

Optimism —————————— Pessimism

Sweet ———————————– Bitter

Brightness —————————- Dimness

Freshness —————————– Decrepitude

Vitality ———————————- Depression

Eagerness —————————– Weariness

Strength ——————————– Weakness

Riches ———————————- Poverty

Hope ———————————— Despair

Comfort ——————————— Discomfort

Wanted ——————————— Unwanted

Happiness —————————— Unhappy

Security ——————————— Insecure

Certainty ——————————– Uncertainty

Love ————————————- Hate

Fascination —————————– Aversion

Acceptance —————————- Rejection

Bonding ——————————— Aloneness

Relationship Riches —————— Emotional Poverty

Emotional Fullness ——————- Aridity/Desert

Satisfaction —————————– Dissatisfaction

Fulfillment ——————————- Unfulfillment

Wonder ———————————- Dis-spirited

Trust ————————————– Mistrust

Connectedness ————————- Loneliness

Union ———————————— Separate

Commonality ————————— 0 Commonality

Support ———————————- 0 Support

Care ————————————— Apathy

Interests ———————————- Disinterest

Libido ————————————- Anhedonia

Power ———————————— Helplessness

Direction ———————————- Aimlessness

Admiration ——————————– Contempt

Pride ————————————— Guilt

Health ————————————- Malaise/Disease

Coherence ——————————- Chaos

Inspiration ——————————- Torment

Belief ————————————- Dis-Belief

Personality Power ——————— Weakness of Will

Self-Concept ————————— Loss of self

Dreams ———————————- Loss of dreams

Fantasy ———————————- Loss of fantasy

Vision ———————————— Blurry

Known ———————————– Unknown

Ground ———————————- Groundless Abyss

Goodness ——————————- Cruelty

Consciousness ————————- Unconsciousness

Imagination —————————– Flatness

Pleasure ——————————— Pain

Ease ————————————- Stress

Becoming —————————— Being

Humor ———————————– Loss of Humor

Safety ———————————– Fear

From the dimension higher than experience point of view,

All experience is equivalent,

And this dimension is at rest outside of all experience.

It is transcendent of all experience.

All experiences are ‘experience flavor’

– All sensory experiences are ‘sensory flavor’

– All material experiences are ‘material flavor’

– All emotional experiences are ’emotion flavor’

– All mental experiences are ‘mental flavor’

When seen from this abstract point of view, the point of view transcends the specific forms in each of these flavors.

Now this abstract point of view, is form agnostic, and allows ANY form to exist because all form is equivalent.

The more abstract you go, the more and more forms in various planes of experience get freedom and your identification is moved to higher and higher levels of abstraction until you reach the ‘GOD’ identification.

The GOD identification is the most abstract and that is why ‘Journey to God, is the same as Journey to the Abstract’.

It occurs to me whether you serve your needs or other people’s needs, from a higher viewpoint, they both are equivalent – i.e. basically movement towards serving need appearances.