The connection between power and resistance

The experience of power is possible only when overcoming resistance.
Power is when you push(force) against a resistant force – could be a medium/field/object etc.
So power needs resistance.
If there is no resistance, power is irrelevant.

Power also needs separation.
Power is a relational quality between 2 separate forces.
The relation of one force with another force.

Rant: The higher reality is the ultimate humiliation for the Ego

Learning about the intricate workings of the human body and its workings is paralyzing me.
Its like the centipede thinking about how it is moving all its legs and it is thrown into chaos.
The body is insanely fragile and taking care of it means a total 100% commitment to it, causing 100% loss of freedom, from all its accumulated dos and donts.
The vulnerability of the body is enormous.
Everything and anything can potentially go wrong.
There is potential for endless hurts, injuries, pain and debilitation.
Pain ends all freedom.
Also the part that even if I perfectly take care of it, it is going to deteriorate and perish one day anyway right?
How does everyone ignore this plight of existence?
And what can really matter in this plane being such a paralyzing prison?
Reality is a paralyzing prison when seen by the thinking mind, as it tries to hold on to all of its knowledge in order to prevent damage, injury, pain, suffering, agony.
So how helpless I am, I have this fragile-fragile-body that can be destroyed by just about anything(innumerable forces)?
How can my intellect ensure my protection with this kind of existential condition?
My fear of pain and suffering – paralyzes me – because it can come from anywhere.
How can I fearlessly go about my activities, when I know that damage can come from anywhere?
It is also true that pleasure, growth, ecstasy, involvement, and great adventures too can come from anywhere.
But I have no idea what is what.

My mind is simply helpless against this infinity.
How much can it do and hold and strategize?
My mind must become a servant to god and simply handle whatever situation is given to it and whatever capacity it is given at that moment.
This is extraordinarily humiliating for my ego(mind) – My ego has to live like a total slave and submit to whatever reality the higher chooses at each moment.
What is the use of doing anything, when I can be broken down at any time, at the whim of the higher power?
The higher power does not show itself to most people, and so their ego is mostly in charge and quite confident.
But even if the higher power gives me one sweeping strike, my ego realizes how it can be pinned to the ground and debilitated completely by this force.
So yea then I am a servant of god, my ego and mind are servants of god/’higher reality’ inaccessible to me now.
How can I feel happy about this?
This is like abject servitude and enslavement.
What freedom do I as the ego have?
I am completely utterly enslaved.
I’m relegated to simply being a witness.
This is like being totally and utterly helpless and powerless.
The higher could give me a measly power and take it away anytime too, like a bully can corner a student, take away his stuff, and then say offer to give him back his pencil, only to pull it away from him when he reaches for it, and then have a laugh. What a humiliation it is.
The vulnerability I have to live with is that all of the worst hellish realities can happen, I can be mutilated, tortured, thwarted, cheated, ridiculed, overpowered, destroyed, disabled – anything can happen.
My own history is a testament too, to some of this.
I mean the dilemma here is, how am I stuck with a fragile body in a kind of unpredictable universe.
The other can be cruel/brutal to me or be kind/compassionate and I have no control. All I can do is put up a tantrum, start a non-cooperation and measly defenses against these forces.
And even if the good times come, how can I rest at ease thinking the tortures are gone forever, they are only a breath away and the entire reality can flip in an instant.
Such is my existential condition with its fragility, vulnerability and humiliation possibility.
On the other side, strength, power, toughness and grace are also possibilities, but it doesn’t damn matter because “I AM NOT IN CHARGE 😦 :(”
I will have to helplessly receive and do my part for whatever is given.
This is horrific humiliation.
How is this different from having a crazy huge dinosaur in your house, which sometimes licks your face, but you know very well, if he chooses, he can bite the shit out of you in seconds.
How can you feel good when he is nice to you and licks your face?
Won’t you be perennially terrified? and in fear? and in defense? and in a clenched contracted state? no matter what is given to you? – be it status quo, be it pain, be it pleasure, be it growth, be it death?
The point is, the very fundamental core of my existence is insecure.
I am like an ant walking happily on the street where it would only take a fraction of a second for a human to stomp on me, and even if I see it coming, I will have nowhere to run.
How can I live in such a scary existential situation where EVERYTHING can be taken away in an instant?
This is worse than serving Hitler, because at-least he could not take away your deep beliefs and philosophy.
Here in this case, the higher power can take away EVERYTHING and even ANNIHILATE you totally.
Not only that, we already have a death sentence, each and every human being, we are just standing on the death rows and even the time and place of our death is not revealed to us.
It will happen anytime when we are unprepared.
It is like your friend telling you that he will shoot you with a sniper anytime and you will never know when.
Now in this kind of existential situation, how can I feel assured, safe?
And what is trust really? God is both the creator and destroyer. So where is the question of trust when TOTAL destruction and the very elimination of all of you is only a matter of time?
Even what is good or bad, what is a blessing or curse, I cannot know with my measly mind.
I feel like an ant living inside an ant colony in the middle of the street, totally vulnerable to what the humans around me do to me.
A small boy might just come and kick the hill and destroy the colossal effort I put in to build it.
OR they could just throw a bucket of water, ruining everything leaving me gasping for my life and most probably dying.
How can I enjoy life in such an existential condition?
Every moment of this situation is terror and fear.
I cannot live like this, I want to be the creator and live as the creator and not as this severely humiliating pawn who is utterly at the MERCY of the unknown.
Children are like that, when they are born.
They are utterly at the mercy of their parents.
Utterly helpless.
In the grander scheme how are we different from the new-borns in the hands of the higher power/God? We are completely and utterly at its mercy.
Without faith, not even 1/billionth of enjoyment would be possible.
Without faith, one would be cowering in fear and frozen into an unmoving ball – like the only man standing in front of a world of zombies from the “I am legend movie”.
But this faith for God cannot be for self-preservation because God is both the creator and destroyer, so it follows that you will be destroyed.
Death is inevitable for each and every one and every thing.
Imagine you created a puppet and that puppet has consciousness.
That is analogous to our condition, we are the puppets.
The puppet is us, and the creator is like the higher power.
When this terrifying condition of the ego is seen, the only quest is to find the higher truth and live as the deeper reality instead of living as the helpless ego.
This condition otherwise is the ultimate humiliation for the ego, its ultimate mockery.

Labels vs Actuals

Aphorism:
A rose by any other name, would still smell as sweet.
Corollary:
A foul smelling flower would still smell foul, even if you call it a rose.

So relationship, family, friends, marriage, relatives – all of them are just LABELS.
Look under the label to see the actual flower.
See the actuals, not the labels.

Journey into my deepest values

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What I am is ultimately what I value.
As I go deep into my contemplative journey,
To discover my truest and deepest value,
To discover my true original essence,
I am plunged into a catharsis, a purging

I listen to myself deeply,
And ask, what do you love
I go silent and try to feel the answer, the vibration
As I journey into this question
I feel like I’m drawn more and more into an abyss
I am taken away from the world of forms
Into subtle boundless feelings
I’m am unable to go much further for much longer
As my ego pulls my “focus” back on the world of form

The journey within takes me into an abyss, a catatonia, a coma like state, a formless state, a state approaching deep sleep.
A pure boundless/infinite feeling space.
By this I can see, that my love for specific forms has been lost.
What I love/value now, has become much more diffuse and subtle.

And in this alchemical journey,
I feel like my value is vacating this world.
I am being drawn to the ocean depths of my psyche.
The dark deep blue where very little light is present.
I cannot see anything here
I only feel, all is “feeling” here

In this condition, it is clear that the job of my ego now is to let go.
My soul cathexis has vacated its structures,
It therefore no longer has energy to BE.
It is undergoing an organic dissolution
I feel like I’ve entered and ventured so deep into the ocean waters
I have lost my desire for the surface waters

All my attachments pull on me
It is as if your monthly salary is gradually being reduced
And this is straining the edifice of all of my lifestyle
I let go more and more of form
Until there is no-thing
Until there is no-thing left to lose anymore

This brings the transcendent void, infinite diffused feeling focus.
I am now a deep ocean creature and live in a mystical no-thingness subtle space
This state reminds me of sleep, it approaches it.
With more and more relinquishing of attachment I am able to go deeper and deeper.
Trust becomes a major issue, and fears kick in to constantly concentrate my focus energy on my most pressing issues.
I no longer “know” where I am going and am trusting the unknown more and more.
For knowledge is just a crutch we most often cling to to compensate for our lack beliefs, fear beliefs, and mistrust.
I am being swallowed by a force larger than myself and returning.

About humiliation, despair, defeat

Humiliation/powerlessness/total defeat/despair is from the ego’s point of view.
From the enlightened point of view, it is a process of dissolution of what is false anyway, the ego.
So from the fading “false point of view” it looks like a nightmare.
But from the point of view of the TRUTH, this process is the very passage/medicine that will take you to freedom.

Chakric Realms and God frequency

1 – When physicality dominates – emotions are silenced.
2 – When emotion dominates – mind is silenced.
3 – When mind dominates – love is silenced.
4 – When love dominates – true expression (doing the right thing in accordance with divine principle) is silenced.
5 – When true expression dominates – perception is silenced.
6 – When perception dominates – the divine is silenced.
Ultimately the goal is harmony of the whole.
And this harmony is already present once ‘WE’ step out of the way and let the effortless/perfect unfolding happen.
Even the slightest personal doing on our part (in any of these realms) results in disruption of the smooth flow.
So our personal doing is the ignorance.
The “Person” is “IGNORANCE” itself.
In truth, there is no real/substantial person, beyond it being just one of the appearances.
YOU do not exist.
Illumination is to see there is no person.
Rather there is only divine light, and the person was just a form that was held onto, because of FALSE IDENTIFICATION.
So all holding on is false identification and ignorance.
Letting go, in all the chakric realms will free all your chakras.
Desire moves everything.
Desire/Longing for this transcendence and its movement is the upward movement of the being frequency itself.
It is the movement of “being” towards God frequency.
The God frequency is the highest frequency (tends to infinity).
When Being realizes it is the God frequency, then it allows everything and gives total freedom to all forms in the higher density realms, meaning total freedom, release and full understanding of all chakras.
The journey to God is a miraculous one/unimaginable one, you can never know how it will take shape.
If you know how it works, that means, that knowing is a dead structure, that needs to be made alive with divine light and freed.

List of Inspirational Speakers

  1. Eckhart Tolle
  2. Shinzen Young
  3. Sadhguru
  4. Adyashanti
  5. Terrence Mckenna
  6. Bashar
  7. Robert Alias
  8. Jeff Foster
  9. PillaiCenter: Dattatreya siva baba
  10. Swami Vivekananda
  11. Richard Feyman
  12. Alan Watts
  13. UG Krishamurti
  14. Jiddu Krishnamurti
  15. Mooji
  16. Abraham Hicks
  17. Deepak Chopra
  18. Conference Report Youtube Channel (certain parts)
  19. Osho
  20. Ozen Rajneesh
  21. Peter Marchand
  22. Peter Russell
  23. Wayne Dyer- Taoism
  24. Michael Webb – A culture towards awakening blog
  25. Sage Bodhisattva (YouTube)
  26. Ram Daas
  27. Yuttadhammo
  28. Adi Da
  29. Benitho Massaro
  30. Scott Kiloby
  31. Charlie Hayes
  32. Vijai S Shankar
  33. Tony Parsons
  34.   (YouTube)
  35. Krishnananda (successor to Sivananda)
  36. Gurdjieff
  37. Ouspensky
  38. Nityananda
  39. ScientificMysticism (YouTube)
  40. Rupert Spira
  41. Francis Lucille
  42. Robert Wolfe
  43. Jiddu Krishnamurti – Non duality cartoons
  44. Nisargadatta Maharaj
  45. Jed Mckenna
  46. Ramana Maharishi
  47. Timothy Leary
  48. Bruce Lee
  49. Carl Jung
  50. Lisa Cairns
  51. Shunyamurti
  52. Richard Lang
  53. Douglas Harding
  54. Andrew Cohen
  55. Abraham Hicks
  56. Sen (Calm down mind)
  57. Gabor Mate
  58. Paul Brunton
  59. St. John of the Cross
  60. Atulanand Ji
  61. Ramesh S. Balsekar
  62. Peter Russel
  63. Maithreyaa Swame
  64. Barry Long
  65. David Hawkins
  66. Ishwar Puri
  67. Linda Clair
  68. Kyle Cease
  69. Gary Weber
  70. Manly P. Hall
  71. Youtube: Channel higher self
  72. Almine
  73. Jayson Wiggins
  74. Peter Holleran (Mountainrunnerdoc blog)
  75. Shunya Yoga – Amir Mourad
  76. Joe Rogan
  77. Benjamin Smythe
  78. Robert Anton Wilson – 8 circuit model
  79. Ocyphius
  80. Jason Shulman
  81. Baba Ramdev
  82. Scott Mandelker
  83. Thich Nhat Hanh
  84. Mark Passio
  85. Ra – Law of One
  86. Trevor Ilesley
  87. Jordan Peterson
  88. Matt-Kahn
  89. Sam Harris
  90. Dr. Michael Laitman
  91. Brian Alger
  92. Alan Mcfarlane
  93. Sri Summairu
  94. Dr Hew Len
  95. Burt Harding
  96. Mukti (Adyashanti’s wife)
  97. Elliott Hulse
  98. Eli Jaxon-Bear
  99. Poonja Papaji
  100. Anadi
  101. Craig Holiday
  102. Michael Beckwith
  103. Sam Geppi (astrology)
  104. Swami Kriyananda
  105. Brijesh Gautam (hindi discourse)
  106. Tom Campbell (simulation theory)
  107. Teal Swan
  108. Aaron Abke
  109. Yogaprasad Institute (YouTube channel)
  110. Sarvapriyananda
  111. Yogiraj SatGurunath Siddhanath

Channels

  1. Spirit science channel
  2. Vsauce channel
  3. Victor Otto channel

Books highly recommended:

    1. 1. In Search of the Miraculous – PD Ouspensky
    1. 2. States of Consciousness – Charles Tart
    1. 3. Altered States of Consciousness – Charles Tart
    1. 4. Breaking open the head (A Psychedelic Journey)- Daniel Pinchbeck
    1. 5. I am that – Nisargadatta Maharaj
    1. 6. Open Secret – Wei Wu Wei
    1. 7. The Attention revolution – Alan Wallace
    1. 8. Spiritual Enlightenment the damnedest thing – Jed Mckenna
    1. 9. Alkuajatus – The original thought
    1. 10. Alkuajatus – Report from a free world
    1. 11. A course in consciousness
    1. 12. The Ayahuasca Experience – Antipodes of the mind
    1. 13. Non-violent communication – Marshall
    1. 14. Freedom from the known – Jiddu Krishnamurti
    1. 15. Disappearance of the universe – Gary Renard
    1. 16. Confusion no more – Ramesh Balsekar
    1. 17. Yoga Sutras – Patanjali (http://www.swamij.com/yoga-sutras.htm)
    1. 18. Care of the soul – Thomas Moore
    1. 19. Ego and the Dynamic Ground – Michael Washburn
    1. 20. Collision with the Infinite – Suzanne Segal
    1. 21. The point of existence – Transformations of Narcissism – A. H. Almaas
    1. 22. The pearl beyond price – Integration of Personality into Being – A.H. Almaas
    1. 23. Mystic Musings – Sadhguru
    1. 24. Fading towards enlightenment – Wayne Wirs
    1. 25. Living with Reality – Who we are…
    1. 26. Dispelling Wetiko: Breaking the Curse of Evil
    1. 27. Bruce Lee – Artist of life
    1. 28. Kabbalistic Healing – A path to an awakened soul
    1. 29. The Kybalion – By three initiates
    1. 30. Pathwork lectures: http://pathwork.org/the-lectures/
  1. Power vs. Force – David Hawkins
  2. Death – An Inside Story