Tag: Philosophy

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Reflections on my life experience now

wave

I am not able to understand anything totally.
All my ‘intellectual grasps’ are like views from high points of different waves arising in the ocean.
What is the ocean itself?
The more I inquire I see that I am not perception at all.
I am deep sleep itself, the cessation, the void, the unmanifest, from which manifest-conscious arises like a wave and passes back.

This is a time in my life where the ocean does not have any 1 continuous wave, but rather has 100s of waves arising and passing.
Each time, my “perception” arises out of the wave, as a relationship between the wave and the ocean, and then returns to the ocean in deep sleep again.
The ocean is the true fount of my creativity, it creates waves of creative-impulse/inspiration that rise up as manifest-consciousness and after that return to the unmanifest.
The wave is a new creative thought/form/relationship/connection/theme/frame/theory/idea/insight.

It seems like perception and separation are connected because perception is always a relationship.
No relationship = ONE = Union = No perception = A void.

I see a continuous BIPOLAR state in me:
Wildly and quickly oscillating, waxing-waning, coming-going, rising-falling, empowering-disempowering, bright-dark, energetic-dull, free-afflicted.
This strong cycling of dualities makes visible the emptiness and non-essence of all of it.
I am neither depressed nor happy, neither free nor afflicted, neither interested nor bored.
Each is a state of consciousness, a state of the wave’s relationship to the ocean.
When the ocean emits the wave = it creates the positive emotion from the wave’s point of view.
When the ocean pulls back the wave = it create the negative emotion from the wave’s point of view.

Essentially, it is the attachment to the ‘States of consciousness (SOCs)’ that is being tested.
The attachment results in [pleasure+fear] in the rise cycle, and [pain+longing] in the fall cycle.
I realize that my desire is for the WAVE itself and its point of view vs. flatlining into the ocean.
The waves/cycles have also been intense and narrow for me, which causes a mild psychosis like feeling.
The intense creative activity of mine is showing that I am operating very close to ocean.
That is why there is the constant alternation between the ‘end of me’ and the ‘me arising each time differently from a new inspiration’.
I have not had any continuous long-range inspiration at this stage of life nor in this life in general.

We move away from god/unmanifest in an inbreath – wave rising.
We move towards god/unmanifest in an outbreath – wave falling.
My life experience now is more like a series of short-waves, flutter breaths (rapid extremely shallow in-out breaths).
It is like like living 1000s of lives in one life, in very rapid cycles.

I realize my attachments are much more abstract than I thought.
I cling to the peaks of the cycle, and try to increase its dynamic range, i.e. I try to make the lights brighter, and the darks darker.
Each arising wave is like an upsurge of inspiration that separates me from the ocean and allows separation/perception/consciousness/relationship, which is what I desire.
This is my WILL to be, my WILL to exist, my WILL to rise and live as a wave.
So I then try to hold on to these inspirations as far as possible.
This is why there is this continuous clinging present.

It is like living a new character in a new movie everyday, and each time you continuously cling to the movie, because you do not want it to end.
It is like struggling to be born, because various desires push our a wave of birth/inspiration, but they only last a day at most and return to the ocean.
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Memory creation and fading

As life moves, there are various possibilities:
Inbreath stage: Sunrise: Childhood
1. New memories are made much more rapidly, than the fading of the old memories = birth, becoming, forming, progress, ascent.
Holding stage: Daytime: Adulthood
2. New memories are made at the same rate, as the fading of old memories = balance, plateau, steadiness, refinement.
Outbreath stage: Sunset
3. New memories are made at a much slower rate, while fading of old memories is happening rapidly = ripening, descent, reverie, nostalgia, retreat.
Vacuum stage: Nighttime
4. Neither is any new memory formed, nor is any old memory faded = Statis, Sleep, Death, total withdrawal.

It swings like a pendulum:
Losses ——|—— Gains
Death ——|——- Life
Dissolution —-|—- Formation
Sleep —–|—– Waking
Nighttime —-|—- Daytime
Outbreath —-|—- Inbreath

This is the life cycle that can be seen at all scales of form:
Like look at a banana. A time lapse of its life.
As it [emerges, becomes full size, ripens, rots].
Even the process of digestion mirrors this pattern.
[intake, break down, extraction, excretion]
Every birth-death is a cycle.

Now the question would be, if this is all a cycle, it is zero sum, what is the gain?
Yes, a cycle by itself is 0 sum.
The logic here is, the gain derived from living through any cycle always lies beyond the cycle.
The part of you that is beyond this cycle, that is the part that gains from the cycle.
The gain lies not in the cycle, but beyond it.
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The intention of my blog posts

How many faces can you see in this picture?

facespuzzle

Each face represents a certain way of seeing, isn’t it?
My blog posts are something like that.
They are cues/pointers/symbols for various forms of seeing, perspectives, heights of perception, and various intelligences.
The intention of my blog posts is to “awaken perspectives” and “meta-cognition”.
As the title of my blog suggests, I myself am journeying to the abstract.
So, it is like, as I ascend to the sky like a hot-air balloon, I contemplate and reflect on what I see, and take various snapshots of different views and share it here as a kind of art.
My posts are not absolutes but are more like art pieces/snapshots from various heights of perception.
Though my posts can, at times, appear to be all around the place, in the larger sense, they mirror my own journey and evolution.
So I expect that the posts may get more ethereal with time.
But I never know.

The posts are not intended to replace your current point of view, rather, they are various forms of art/seeing/exercises that I share, to awaken/clarify/enrich that level of your own intelligence/height of perception.
Like how one learns addition in math, not by by-hearting 2+2=4, 4+4=8 etc., but by solving various kinds of addition problem exercises.
Similarly, all of my posts are “perspective art forms” of truths I share from my own level of vision/perception, and they are meant to awaken your own intelligence at various levels.
For people who are already awake to these perspectives, it is still a joy to share all of this with them as a form of play.
And every time someone reads and benefits from my content, it gives me encouragement to continue this work.
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Death and Life are both NOW

When we speak of death, or think about it,
That is death as a thought/concept.
The concept of death is always connected to time.
It is a thought about the future, usually the far future.
“What will happen to me after I die, maybe 40 years or 60 years later?”
“How will I die? What will be my state at that time?
“What will I be feeling at that time?”
“Who will be beside me at that time?”
“What place will I be in (a hospital, my bedroom…)?”
All of that is death as a thought.

Fear of death happens when death is thought about.
The more imaginative a person is, the stronger he will feel it.
Because of the extent of deep extrapolation and conception he can do.
A powerful imagination superimposes itself over the base reality overloading it with “context/meaning/memory/past-future/likely possibilities”.
And then the body reacts to whatever picture that presents.

Death as a reality however is always NOW.
You face death now, You face life now.
Every moment is changing.
If you see what was lost(negative existence), you see death.
If you see what was gained(positive existence), you see life.
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The deeper dimensions of senses

The whole body smells, the nose is the epicenter (affect of air).
The whole body tastes, the tongue is the epicenter (affect of water).
The whole body hears, the ears are the epicenter (affect of sound).
The whole body sees, the eyes are the epicenter (affect of light).
The whole body acts, the hands and legs are the epicenter (affect of fire)
The whole body talks, the mouth is the epicenter (affect of ether)
The whole body touches, the genitals/mouth/hands are the epicenter (affect of earth).
(That is why sex revolves around those primary elements)

Close your mouth = a withdrawal of communication
Close your ears = a withdrawal of understanding
Close your eyes = a withdrawal of vision
Close your nose = a withdrawal of intuition
Close your body = a withdrawal of action
Close your tongue = a withdrawal of feeling
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Holographic nature of experience

In Holographic systems:
The micro and macro are the same.
Micro == Macro, Macro == Micro
(== ‘double equals’ is correspondence, left implies/reflects right, right implies/reflects left)

As above, so below. As below, so above.
Above == Below, Below == Above

As outside so inside, as inside so outside.
Inside == Outside, Outside == Inside
The outer is a reflection of the inner.
The inner is a reflection of the outer.

As you are, so is the world.
As is the world, so are you.
You == World, World == You

Tree is a reflection of the Root.
Root is a reflection of the Tree.
Tree == Root, Root == Tree

When you are sick, the whole world is sick.
When your wonderful, the whole world is wonderful.
When you laugh, the whole world laughs with you.
When the whole world is seen as laughing, it is you who is laughing inside.

The world is a projection of you, You are the projection of the world.
The way you feel == Is the way the world feels
The way the world feels == Is the way you feel
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Paradoxes and Oxymorons of Truth

PARADOXES:
Truth is:
Freedom ——— Rule based
Free will ——- Predetermined
Unconstrained — Constrained
Local ——————– Non-local
Light ———– Dark
Known ———– Unknown
Consciousness —- Unconsciousness
Unchanging ——- Changing
Essence ———- Non-essence
Illusion ———— Reality
Attained/Strive —– Already here/Realized
Complex ————— Simple
Multiple —————- One
Focused ————– Broad
Graspable ————- Ungraspable
Limited —————- Unlimited
Something ————- Nothing

OXYMORONS:
Truth is:
Freedom-based rules ——– Rule-based freedom
Free predetermination ——— Predetermined free
Unconstrained constrainment ——- Constrained unconstrainment
Localized non-locality ———— Non-localized locality
Light Dark ————- Dark Light
Known Unknown ——- Unknown known
Conscious Unconsciousness ——- Unconscious consciousness
Unchanging changing ———— Changing Unchanging
Essential non-essence ——— Non-essential essence
Illusory reality ————– Real illusion
Attained realization ———- Realized Attainment
Complexly Simple ———– Simply complex
Multiple One —————– One Multiple
Focused Broad ——– Broad Focused
Graspable Ungraspable ——— Ungraspable Graspable
Limited Unlimited ———– Unlimited Limited
Something made of Nothing ———- Nothing made of Something
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Enlightenment is recognition

Realization is the same as recognition.
There is only recognition in experience.
Your experience is bathed in recognition.
All is recognized by you, all is known by you, all is in your memory.
Experience itself is from the ongoing recognition.

You will know it,
when you are ready to know,
when you are willing to know,
when you are dying to know,
when you remove all the obstacles that are prevent you from knowing.

Just look at something deeply, and open yourself to it, the revelation will pour in.
You don’t have to try, rather you should simply remove the obstacles to the communion.
You just have to open to it, to receive it.
Look at all your hatred, attachments, fears, expectations, imposed preconceived ideas.
Drop all of that, because it is those preoccupations that are preventing you from receiving.

The pure intention to know something, and when it is not blocked by anything, will make you know the thing in its full entirety, because you are only clearing the way for your own remembering (re-membering, meaning receiving/putting the pieces together, and gaining gnosis).
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Experience of time

Life is neither long nor short.
Clock time does not exist by itself or independently in our experience.
Clock time has no substance but derives all its substance from ‘psychological time’.
All experience of time in essence is ‘psychological time’.
We tune ourselves (our psychological time) to the clock only for social and collaboration convenience.
And psychological time is connected to goals/desires.
Each goal/desire sets up psychological time for you to ride that wave.
Your experience of time is a lot more connected to your heart’s desires.
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The adventure of life

The adventure of life is scary when there is permanence.
But impermanence/emptiness frees you.
As you grow older, you see all was a passing experience.
Like a passing spring breeze carrying various scents.
This mortality/impermanence/change/emptiness is the true transcendent context.
That is where your higher self/god experiences reality from.
It is all the play of god, to be experienced as the passing breeze it is.
Even thinking it is all real, is part of it, creating the peak of immersion.
The more you ground yourself deeper into emptiness, the wilder your life gets.