Bullies and Victims, ‘Going out of the way’ relationships

In a sense, both bullies and victims are disconnected souls.
One has left his home to attack, the other has left his home to defend.
One has left to do a pre-emptive strike, the other has left to defend from such strikers.
Both have left their homes, they are exiles, disconnected, separate, alone.
Existentially in a similar condition of disconnection.
From that perspective, both the bullies and victims are existential victims of separation/disconnection.

The same thing is true in certain kinds of relationship too.
Someone who goes all out, to experience the relationship loses touch with his home. He is at the mercy of the condition of the relationship.
If the relationship is good, he feels jubilant, else if the relationship is bad, his whole experience takes a bad turn.
He gives himself entirely to the mercy of the relationship.
Such a person does not have his home support/comfort/security/strength behind him, the relationship means everything to him until it lasts.
He holds on to it for his life, since that is the last straw he is grasping onto.
Such people, who abandon themselves to seek relationship, have in a sense always been lost from the get go and are trying to find home/safety/happiness/security via. the relationship, but the truth is, they can only find that if they return home.
The relationship does little to relieve this person of his background condition of being away from his home.
The interesting part here is, there is no good and bad apart from perspective.
This experience of being the outcast lost soul, can be seen as a unique and sublime experience by itself. It is the beauty of the sheer adventure of it and the extreme heights and risks such a person takes to find his comfort/security/happiness.
If I was a soul, if I was given a choice between a fully secure home connection vs. this adventure of disconnection and finding home, I could have very well chosen the latter happily.
After all, the happiness of home is only when you have traveled everywhere in deep insecurity and longing.

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