Wisdom for helping others

Beings learn at their own pace from their own level.

# They may even go the wrong direction until they realize rock-bottom or the dead end or the circular nature of their condition.

# Even if insight is given to them, depending on their level of awakeness they may even ignore it completely or forget it almost immediately.

# There has to be enough ego/self/responsibility/vision in them to even understand/consider the significance/relevance of the insight communicated to them.

# And if there is more than sufficient ego/self/responsibility/vision, then they would willingly be receptive/investigating/investing in suggestions for growth and vision improvements.

# Greater their vision/level of development, more would be their receptivity to even the smallest suggestions/cues, and they would take it upon themselves to advance/progress.

So it is important to keep these things in mind before helping someone.
Without this wisdom, the helper’s energy gets significantly wasted.

The duality of travel experiences

Here are the duality spectrums that relate to home and travel:
Comfort ——————– Discomfort
Instant gratification —— Delayed gratification
Security ——————– Insecurity
Safety ———————- Risks
Convenience ————– Inconvenience
Familiarity —————– Newness
Sameness —————– Novelty
Certainty ——————- Uncertainty
Predictability ————– Unpredictability
Relaxation —————– Stress
Reflection —————— Action
Digestion ——————- Consumption
Sleep ———————– Waking
Stasis ———————– Growth
Knowledge —————– Learning
Settled ———————- Seeking
Ease ———————— Unease
Homeostasis ————— Altered states
Health ———————- Sickness
Death ———————– Life
Retreat ——————— Exploration
Para-SNS ——————- SNS (Sympathetic nervous system)
Regeneration ————– Expenditure
Gathering —————– Expending
Freedom ——————- Constraints
Abundance —————– Limitation
Home ———————– Adventure

Each of the above pairs represents different degrees of the same essence.
Also, in these word pairs above, there are positive and negative connotations.
I could flip it up and it would reverse what is desirable and undesirable.
For example, the negative interpretation of freedom is ‘psychosis’, and the positive interpretation of constraints is ‘healthy boundaries’.
This can be done for every word-pair above.

The unspeakable torture possible from the mother

This is to speak about a case where the mother clings to the infant stage of the child’s growth, and actively and violently opposes its development and independence beyond that stage, so as to keep getting great narcissistic supplies from the child of “adoration/respect/desirability/admiration/grandiosity/greatness/praise” and enjoy a god like feeling of power and omnipotence in comparison to the child.

Remember, all power is relative.
So the power differential between the infant and the mother is the greatest possible difference.
The mother can get instantly addicted to THIS level of narcissistic supply from the child, and this will esp. happen if the mother did not have any life of her own and had a dependent personality before the event of child birth.
Once deeply addicted to this care-giving and protecting role, the mother may actively oppose the child’s independence, be hostile to the developing child beyond the age of 2 itself.
The mother can actively reinforce the dependence again and again ad infinitum, conveying that “you need me, you cannot live without me” in a million ways said and unsaid.
Such a mother focuses the child only on itself, and the child sacrifices its own self-awareness to please the mother developing codependence.
Really after all the origins of codependence is the narcissistic parent who purposely enforces dependence in subliminal, indirect, and direct ways, and actively opposes the child’s developing separation and independence, so that they can have an endless source of narcissistic supply and meaning from the child.
Often they also cleverly hide it by programming the child to believe, it was its own choice to be that way, and that it can’t help it.
They may even keep telling the neighbors and friends things like “my child needs me for everything, they are such a burden, I keep telling them to do things by themselves, but they keep coming back to me, what can I do?!”
This is just the narcissists game.
This is a microcosmic version of the game of training a slave to believe that he is actually not a slave, but is choosing from his free will.
It all starts at this level.

Just like doctors who save patients are considered to be doing a divine profession higher in value and weight than most other professions, mothers are given this kind of deification and supreme value too.
So a mother can exploit this for a long time, by actively working to keep the child dependent on her and opposing the child’s development/independence in every crooked, unspeakable mystical way possible.
I can elaborate on all those psychic techniques but that may detract from the main points I want to convey in this post.

This can be experienced as extreme suffocation, stifling, and pain, for the child.
But since it is programmed to idolize the mother, it can never imagine going against the mother.
So it condemns itself, and thinks it is the real problem, and the god-like omnipotent mother is always right.
It thinks if it is pained by the mother, it is because, it is defective and needs to be fixed.
And later in life this may slide to depression if it loses all hope after trying out everything and failing.
In truth, this whole thing was really engineered and transmitted from the mother herself.
In the progression of this myth, from this child’s point of view, total powerlessness and despair and depression is an EXPECTED stage that has to be passed.

The mother’s relationship has to keep evolving as the child evolves/grows/matures/separates/independent-izes itself.
So for different people this happens at different times, depending upon the stage of development the mother herself is in.
If the mother herself identifies with being a helpless infant, then she resonates with the child only at that stage, and the child cannot grow beyond that, because it directly faces the threat of losing resonance with the mother.
So the child is then forced to stay infantile even in its later years.
It may be successful in society, but internally its egoic climate is still at the level of the infant only.
So the child may find himself/herself as helpless, powerless, at the mercy of circumstances, unable to establish any identity, and constantly wandering aimlessly.
It may find itself as hyper-sensitive, easily hynotizable and living in a dream-like feeling all the time, and many other such feelings.
It becomes like a Bonsai(miniature) tree, that has grown but not been allowed to grow at the same time.
Often, the child may feel this as a global feeling of being trapped in an incredibly oppressive world, and may become apathetic and depressed from the impossible struggle it would take to change anything in its favor.
Really, this projection of such a tyrannical world, has its roots in the tyrannical mother herself, because it was the mother who was tyrannical in the sense of opposing the child’s independence, and that is later felt by the child as a tyrannical world view itself.

What I speak about here is of unspeakable depth.
Things far less deep, are spoken about so much in society, as so called deep issues.
Real power is always invisible, and the power that is visible is always much lower.
For example here, the mother-child bond is done in secrecy, in the darkness, in great trust.
Nobody ever questions it, and you are shamed even if remotely begin to investigate.
This is a giant taboo in society, because any questioning of it breaks its supremely sanctified and sacred status.
My point is, great wonders and horrors can happen at this stage, at intensities even beyond the most powerful psychedelics.

There has always been extensive talk in society about abusive husbands etc.
Imagine a hyper-possessive husband who keeps his wife like his possession and pet, and pleases her when he wants, beats her up when he wants.
Basically keeps her like his trophy wife, seals her from the outer world, prevents her from having any life outside of him, and controls her like a pleasure-giving slave.
Does this horrify you?
Now, this example I gave above is a weak analogue of the mother-infant situation I describe.
Think about it: What is power? Isn’t all what we call power, a relative concept?
The relativity comes from the power difference.
What is the difference of power between this man and woman living as husband and wife?
And compare that to the difference between a mother (say aged 25+) and an infant(age 0-2)?
The mother for the infant is like an omnipotent god-like being and giant.
But you know what, society will speak endlessly about male violence against women etc.
And this mother-infant dyad, is shrouded, kept under wraps and wraps, sanctified, deified, and any torture that you faced here gets buried as YOUR shame, unspeakable shame of phenomenal intensity.

My point here is not to entirely blame the mother.
The mother herself maybe unconscious of her real power, and how much she affects the infant (the other developing being).
I might have pushed some buttons in this article, but this is in the interest of really looking into this territory of deep psyche experience.
Even if you are a woman, you were also brought up by your mother, so this is not gender-specific.
The purpose of this article, is to illuminate this realm, and to awaken people to it so that they can heal themselves and gain their own insights about their own deep psyche.

Experience is from relative fractal dual natured fields

The celebs IMPRESS (by the images/fantasy) – and the ones who deeply desire the CELEB fantasy want to die into their images and therefore become their fans and vicariously enjoy.
This is in the realm of “celebs and their fans”.
And the whole thing is a matrix.
…Celebs[Fans[Celebs – Fans[Celeb – Fans…]]]…
Every fan is a celeb, and every celeb is a fan.
Its all fractal in nature really, the EXPERIENCE of it.

Similarly there is:
…Guru – Devotee[Guru – Devotee[Guru – devotee]]]…
So every guru is a disciple, and every disciple is a guru, both are simultaneously true, but we can only see one at a time in our minds.
The experience of both is the same:
The Guru is facing south while the Disciple is facing north.

More examples:
…Tyrant[Oppressed[tyrant – oppressed[tyrant – oppressed]]]…
Every tyrant is a victim, and every victim is a tyrant = depending on which direction you look.
The experience of both is the same: One is facing south, One is facing north.

So which “relative fractal dual experience field” are you invested in?:
Celebrity – Fan
Guru – Devotee/Disciple
Tyrant/Oppressor – Victim/Oppressed
Master – Slave
Lover – Beloved
(every lover is a beloved, and every beloved is also a lover)
Admirer – Admired
Narcissist – Codependent
Teacher – Student
Manager – Subordinate
Seeker – Sought-after

Remember the rule for all the examples above:
“Every A is B, and every B is A” – depending on the direction you look.
A corollary that follows is:
If you want to become a master, become an extremely good student.
If you want to become a celebrity, become a deeply loyal fan.
If you want to be a ‘beloved’, then love everyone as intensely as you can.
And so on.

Is your deeper desire to transcend the physical?

Today, I was travelling in a shared taxi and the passenger next to me had a moderate cold (cold virus) and was constantly sniffling. As a reaction to this, I tensed up my body esp. in the stomach and chest, tightening all those inner muscles, and tried to breathe less, and look away from him as much as possible.
The journey lasted 30m, so this condition I was in was getting painful, and I felt really irritated at the passenger beside me, feeling an impulse to just attack him. I ofcourse restrained myself, and put up with this resistance within me and when I reached my destination, the ordeal was over, and I could finally breathe normally again.

Even as those sensations happened in the taxi, I vowed to myself that I would stay AS CONSCIOUS AS POSSIBLE of every single thing happening.
A lot of deep insights came to me even while all of this was happening.
The first insight was that: Actually, my deeper self was ready to allow the cold virus to enter me. My deeper self felt like a omni-directional vacuum unconditionally receiving. It was attracting everything indiscriminately, and the resistance and tightening up I felt was my human self’s/body’s response to the deeper self’s indiscriminate vacuum like attraction.

So my body tightened from within as a protection, to prevent the destructive energy(cold virus) from being pulled in. So though it felt like the other man was to blame for my painful body contraction and so on, I could see that it was only an appearance/projection.
In reality I was afraid of my own deeper self’s attraction, and was resisting against that.
Then I thought about that more deeply, and realized, all fear is essentially your resistance to your own [higher/deeper self’s attraction], isn’t it? (the deeper self could represent the unconscious layer of self beneath the surface feelings/emotions/thoughts felt)
Another example of this would be, when I would peep out of a low balcony at a great height, say 500ft above the ground, I would wonder as to ‘why do I get the fear of falling felt as a contraction/restraint feeling?
I felt the resistance/contraction felt which is termed ‘fear’ which acts counter to the falling movement, is really my resistance towards my own deeper self’s desire to actually FALL (there is an attraction to let go and fall).
The same is true when sometimes if I look at a girl who is provocatively dressed and attractive to me, I feel FEAR (sensation is of contraction and restraint).
What am I really fearing? My fear is actually preventing my deeper self from acting on its desire of being drawn to her.
Similarly, if someone is acting rudely and violating me, I feel fear again, because it is to restrain me (my deeper desire) from attacking him back, which would lead to undesirable consequences for me in the larger picture.
So I see that all fear is me stopping myself, restraining myself from acting on a deeper impulse/force/desire felt.
There could be wisdom in fear too.
Because a wise man has greater vision and can see far-ranging consequences of actions.
Fear/Contraction/Restraint/Stifling is not necessarily negative.

Now, I went further into the inquiry, wondering about, why is the deeper part of me attracting destruction/destructive forces to me?
This has been happening for as long as I remember, and I wanted to get to the bottom of it.
Why is my higher self against my physical thriving? (why do I have a hermit lifestyle? why am I not investing in material security, relationship security etc.?)
When I pondered on this, I realized there is a lot of background metaphysics context that is needed to really look into this question.
What I am resisting/fearing is destruction/dissolution and what I am looking forward to is maintenance/enhancement.
But that part of me is only a small part of me.
There are many more deeper dimensions.
The metaphysics relevant for this case is that:
“Form itself represents lower energy.
The formless is higher energy, and the formless is FREE to take any form as its appearance. But form by itself cannot change without the aid of the formless energy transforming it.”
I remember from my earliest days, my deepest desire was for freedom.
And since the physical form is inherently limited and low energy, I always wanted to transcend it.
That is why I never invested much in my physical identity.
I pondered: Could this be one of the transition stages, one of my final incarnations, to really complete the impulses/desires of the physical and finishing up before moving on to the subtler higher energy realms?
That resonates with the way I have felt all my life.
So then in a way, my higher self is purposely attracting destructive forces, and it reminds me of the dialogue from the movie Jacob’s ladder:
“The only thing that burns in Hell is the part of you that won’t let go of life, your memories, your attachments. They burn them all away. But they’re not punishing you, he said. They’re freeing your soul. If you’re frightened of dying and… and you’re holding on, you’ll see devils tearing your life away. But if you’ve made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the earth. It’s just a matter of how you look at it.”
When a sugar cube gets dissolved into water, is it getting destroyed? or is there simply a transformation of essence?
When seen from a limited perspective, it looks like destruction is destroying essence itself but really, the essence only changes into a subtler form.
Like say I take gold and powder it, and powder it until you cannot see the powder, it will look like the gold has vanished. But really it has only vanished from your perception, not in essence.
Similarly I think, the resistance/fear is coming from the portion of me identified with the physical body, the animal part of me.
Every form/structure/formation/cell resists dissolution.
Like centripetal and centrifugal force, there are 2 forces in us:
‘Self preservation(identification with form)’ and ‘Longing to dissolve(identification with formless)’ forces.
It is not one or the other, rather it is about which is greater.
So when the higher self being a stronger force moves you along the path of dissolution into a higher energy essence form, your lower self experiences change/death, and that is why the resistance and in a way, this suffering is inevitable and can be greatly reduced if the deeper metaphysics is fully understood.
The despair/doom/pain/suffering/resistance are all experiences of the part of that is identified with form.
But if the part of you that longs for freedom is too strong, it will lead you into dissolution.
Notice your longings carefully, and you will see that all that is happening is working with perfection according to the actuals of the forces within.

The 2 drives:
Life drive ——–and——– Death drive
Are both resistances from the lower mortal self -> 2 kinds of rebellion.
To try to die faster than it is happening is to direct aggression towards destruction = death drive.
To try to keep/maintain or enhance things when they are not supported by the higher, is to again direct aggression towards enhancement or maintenance of status quo = life drive.
So what it means in truth/essence is that, life = transformation.
It is now. It is the direct vibration of perception itself.
To the mortal self: It feels like:
Construction = heaven —— Destruction = hell.
But to the deeper self, it is the opposite:
Construction of mortal form = limitation = lower energy state of being —— Destruction of the mortal form = Dissolution = Freedom = Higher energy subtler state of being.
Both the perspectives of the mortal self and the deeper self are simultaneously operating.
Feel your inner space, and understand their dynamics within you, and when you fully allow both construction and destruction, you become the allowing itself, and get subsumed into the NOW.

Life force is the true currency

violetfire

Imagine if there is a ‘life force slider’ and a ‘1 sec = 1 day time’ lapse of a person standing.
If you make life force 0, how long will the degeneration take? 5 to 10 secs?
Whereas if you make the life force full, for say 80 years of life, how long would the degeneration take then? approx 8.75 hours.
So the nature’s degradation rate (its own force) = 5 secs or less
And the rate of degeneration when having life force = 8 hours 45 minutes = 31500 seconds = 6300 times greater than nature’s degradation.
So life force degradation = 6300 times slower than nature’s/earth’s degradation.
That is the level of difference life force makes.

Think of the implications of this.
So we can say, the entirety of your system’s body and its integrity is UPHELD by LIFE-FORCE (prana) only.
Otherwise your body/system/structure will consumed in practically an instant by earth’s natural forces, back into itself.
So all aging is only from the reduction in life force energy.
And all youthing(if there is such a word) is only from the increase in life force energy.
Aging (lose life force) ——————- Youthing (provide life force)
The invisible ‘life force/prana/shakti’ is the real determinant and the ‘only real currency’ fundamentally speaking.

Now, what are the determinants of life force?
If life force itself is invisible then wouldn’t its determinants also be invisible and even subtler?
How can the gross things like food/lifestyle etc. be the determinant of life force?
The gross can only facilitate or impair life force, but it cannot DETERMINE life force.
So by studying the gross you are only studying facilitation, you are only working within the means and making the best adjustments.
It is like learning to live within your means and budget, but it will not INCREASE your fundamental amount of money available.
It will do nothing in terms of understanding the life force itself, and like I wrote earlier that is the TRUE CURRENCY.

Fractal soul visions

Linear time is within a certain frame of reference staying constant.
Beyond linear time is circular time.
And beyond circular time are eternal higher dimensional realities etc.
It gets more and more abstract.

Sometimes when our visions get abstract enough we can see abstract gestalts/patterns repeating again and again like time running through a mobius strip.

For me, the common themes I wrestle with are between:
– Being and Non-being
– Becoming and Unbecoming
– Ground and Groundlessness
– Knowing and Unknowing
– Striving and Surrender
– Linear time and Non-linear time
– Attainment and Non-attainment
– Order and Chaos
– Enlightenment and Non-enlightenment
– Home and travel
– Knowledge and Innocence
– Reality and Illusion

I can explain some of these things with poetic visions.
Here are some of them below:

Vision 1:

abyssedge

I have 2 choices, stay with what I know (what is in my hand) or the other choice is to jump into an unknown abyss.
I am detached from what I have and so at times I get the courage and jump into the abyss.
Now imagine you fall and fall through the unknown but there is no ground and you land up again at a similar place where you were standing before and again there is the same choice – stick to what is in hand(known) or just into the abyss(unknown).
Again this repeats, I work on letting go of the known in hand and get the courage and jump, and this repeats again and again.
This is the play between knowing and unknowing
It is the play between ground and groundlessness

Vision 2:

dream

Imagine you are in a dream and you are trying to wake up, but every time you think you have woken up you later realize you have still been dreaming. And so you try to wake up again, and once again think you have woken up, only to realize soon after that you are still dreaming and have to work again to wake up.
This is the play between reality and illusion

Vision 3:

sandsculpture

I build myself up like a sand structure from the chaos of possibility of the sand on the ground.
I feel I have attained knowledge and being, but soon it falls back to the ground.
Then again I get inspired, and I build another structure, work on it and reach a milestone, only for it to go back to the ground again.
This is like a looping struggle to BE something and not fall back to non-being.
This can be seen as the play of order vs. chaos.
This can also be seen as the play of attainment vs. non-attainment.
It is also the play between becoming and unbecoming.

Vision 4:

Home

Imagine whenever you settled in a place, buy some things, make yourself a home there and create security for yourself, you feel its time to move. You have to move and leave everything behind, go through the grief, and do a similar settlement in your next spot, only for you to again get the impulse to move and do it again.
This is the play between home and travel.

Vision 5:

watchingmovie

Imagine you are sitting in a theater seat and watching a movie, and you go through the story with the hero suffering gains and losses. Suddenly you feel it is getting too much and you want to snap out of it and you come back to your theater seat. You realize that you were always in that seat, nothing has really changed, and the whole movie was an illusion. But then shortly after coming back to the theater seat and disillusioning yourself, you see something else interesting in the screen that once again enchants you, and you start to gain knowledge from investment. And this happens again and again.
This is the play between alternating enlightenment and non-enlightenment
This is the play between alternating knowledge and innocence.