Thoughts about ‘potentials of experience’

Birth is basically birth of a potential.
The feeling of potential OR possibilities is what is felt in childhood.
The experience of death is the experience of loss of potential.
There is the experience of great potential – which is divine inspiration.
There is the experience of little potential – seen as depression (loss of what is loved, which is inspiration)
The attachment is attachment to potentials of experience.
Are we afraid of pain, or are we basically afraid of loss?
Is pain concomitant with loss?
Loss of what we love?
Loss of what we are attached to?
Not necessarily specific objects but it could also be the loss of abstract objects like – loss of ability to verbalize, loss of ability to communicate, loss of ability to understand/make sense of anything, loss of the potential to feel/to think, loss of familiarity – replacement of what is loved with the dual – insecurity, chaos, ambiguity, unknowing, evil, suffering, separation (if what is loved is – security, coherence, clarity, knowing, good, peace, union).
Loss of capacities of psyche – for example you may hear music but not in the matching energetic frequency to sync with it, harmonize with it, union with it.
Death is basically fading away of potentials.
When most potentials fall away, you are left with your root potentials.
The deepest potential loss if ego death, where the potential to ‘selfing’ is lost.
Energy gives rise to potentials. 
Energy = Potentials. Loss of energy = loss of potentials. Energy is similar to money.
When you have a lot of money – a lot of potentials open up. You may or may not use them. But if you have no money, you don’t have those potentials either.
So dark night is basically loss of potentials and the grieving of loss of potentials.
The depression is from the loss of potentials. The struggle is 2 faced: on the one hand, shortage of energy makes living daily life expectations a stretch and difficult – its as if your fatigued and exhausted all the time. The 2nd struggle is the depression itself because of grieving the loss of potentials which were once there.
Rest in the potentials of ‘What is’ as it appears NOW.
Because I see potentials, I never feel like I’ve done a good enough job at anything.
Because I know what it is to really know something. But thats the interesting part, there is nowhere to go. So it does not matter. I can simply observe how far I can see and how far I’ve reached without investment and simply allow happening.
All potentials have to be dealt with equanimity:
Some potentials are karmic repetitive cyclic, habitual and occur with triggers.
So I just patiently observe what happens, the mechanism, what the trigger is and so on.
All my memories are potentials for experiences.
Even recalling them is potentials for experiences.
So the push/pull, grasping/pushing, craving/aversion, attachment/repulsion apply to all potentials too.
All experience is empty – positive and negative.
Experience itself is empty in all its infinite forms. Its a lila/play/dance of empty experiences. There is 100% change. Memory is the only tool we use to hold on. Actually, memory also when seen is simply another empty changing experience. This is the truth of emptiness.
That is why there is nowhere to go, nothing to do, nothing to be, because the potential driving the need to go, do, be itself is also an empty appearance. This potential is not you. You are simply nothing, or the ground of all appearances/experiences. All experiences are appearances. There is only an eternal free fall into emptiness dancing as forms.
As the fire of illumination fills you up, the truth of NOW becomes obvious. The ISness, the YOU ARE THAT. I am the ground of all experience. The ONE TASTE, the unitive flavor of all opposites, everything is ultimately experience, and all experience is empty when seen closely (because it changes).
What we are scared of/fear is also potentials:
Heaven is the potential for gain, joy, pleasure and happiness.
Hell is the potential for loss, suffering, misery, struggle.
Like what is horror, to be stuck in a reality that threatens everything you love, everything you are, everything you are attached to.
A union is made, when 2 potentials match each other.
Which is sharing the same goals.
The highest potential is God Awareness.
So 2 people in the goal to reach God awareness can have the potential for highest union.

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