Only the field exists, you do not

The whole unitive journey is about: becoming the field/surrendering/dissolving/merging into it totally.
Once united, what you are doing then, is what the field is doing.
And it does so automatically and effortlessly, of itself.

You are then simply in a state of absolute transparency, allowing, devotion, until you are not there at all, and only the field is.
RULE: “You are, when the field is not. When the field is, you are not”
So the field is not on your terms.
It is on its own terms.
The field is like the father who is driving.
The son/separate self is like the one with the toy steering that thinks he is driving.
The more ambitious the son, the more obviously he would realize that he was not in control and never was.

RULE: “Only the field exists, you do not exist.”
“You” are an illusion, stemming from ignorance.
There is a singular whole, and that is the only doer.
RULE: “The whole moves the whole, no part moves the whole, no part moves another part.”
RULE: “The same energy that makes the sun come up, the stars shine, the birds chirp, is the same energy that moves me and my experience.”
Relinquish all control and “let go/merge/unite/be/dissolve/align/drop/become one” with the field.
Only the field exists.

Pleasure is a relationship

pure-joy

Pleasure is from a “deep willingness” to “open/include/relate/connect/absorb/commune/merge” your “intelligence” with the other.
It is from the merging of 2 intelligences done willingly.
You “allow” yourself to “dance” and be “touched/moved/uplifted/transformed”.
This mutual interrelationship stirs the depths and plays a rhapsody.
There is a sense of timeless absorption, rapture, and bliss
This ecstasy of union is the highest pleasure.

 

My ultimate desire

I’m not interested in new senses.
I’m not interested in more content.
Rather, I want the “force/cathexis/energy/desire/power/emotion/beauty/interest/passion/love” that functions invisibly with content.
But even all of the above are temporal subtle objects separate from me, which I experience and they can be taken away from me like any-thing temporal.
So what I surrender is not the object, but it is my way of seeing it/the perception of it as separate and the temporal space-time experience that comes as a result of that.
All of enlightenment is only about changing perception and nothing else.
One simply dissolves all separateness into larger and larger spaces, until your identity is all there is.
All drives are like subtle invisible(feeling only, like one feels wind) objects.
And the question is raised “Who/What is it that stands apart and witnesses the object, controls it, acts like a valve of how much energy should go to it”.
What is the control mechanism, valve like mechanism, energy trapper, that directs energy in a certain algorithm towards seemingly external inert objects?”
What is that “machine” that manipulates the shining of the primordial light and focuses it on only some objects and not others?
What is this entity in front of eyes that manipulates my clear seeing in a certain way?
I ultimately just want the ONE(the ultimate one without a second) and I want to MERGE/UNION with it.