Two kinds of relationships

I broadly see 2 kinds of relationships:
Ego relationships: Based on reciprocal exchanges from each others’ reservoirs, transactional relationship.
Source relationships: Based on direct flow from the source.
If you get exhausted/tired/depleted and as a result resenting/angry/demanding – then it is a sign that: 1 – You are in a transactional relationship and the transaction is not really working, like withdrawing cash at an ATM and the ATM deducts the money but does not dispense the cash or gives out only a fraction of it. It is living in scarcity.
2 – Source relationships: Your relationship and investments in it are coming directly as a flow from the source which is abundant and infinite. So that way your reservoir tanks of will are full and you are filled with energy.
Your movement does not drain your resources at all because it is directly working from source energy.
To give another analogy:
Point 1 is like using the laptop battery for power.
Point 2 is like plugging it to an A/C source. So not only is the battery full, you can also do whatever you want without worrying about LOSS of power, or depletion of your battery (reservoir).
Another way to put it would be:
Point 1 is Ego Relationships (fundamentally work on scarcity, just like the money system)
Point 2 is Source Relationships (fundamentally work on abundance, there is only celebration)
Ego relationships though can also be very harmonious and fair, its not wrong or anything, like we see in many of the successful marriages around the world. That would be basically akin to a fair trade system.
Source relationships on the other hand happen when you flow with the source energy and not with your stored reservoir of will. They are effortless and retain fullness at all times.
One way to tune into this reality would be, imagine there are no others at all and there is only you. Now what would you do then? If in such a state of being, you choose to have a relationship and invest in an other(spontaneously), then it is a source relationship.

Bullies and Victims, ‘Going out of the way’ relationships

In a sense, both bullies and victims are disconnected souls.
One has left his home to attack, the other has left his home to defend.
One has left to do a pre-emptive strike, the other has left to defend from such strikers.
Both have left their homes, they are exiles, disconnected, separate, alone.
Existentially in a similar condition of disconnection.
From that perspective, both the bullies and victims are existential victims of separation/disconnection.

The same thing is true in certain kinds of relationship too.
Someone who goes all out, to experience the relationship loses touch with his home. He is at the mercy of the condition of the relationship.
If the relationship is good, he feels jubilant, else if the relationship is bad, his whole experience takes a bad turn.
He gives himself entirely to the mercy of the relationship.
Such a person does not have his home support/comfort/security/strength behind him, the relationship means everything to him until it lasts.
He holds on to it for his life, since that is the last straw he is grasping onto.
Such people, who abandon themselves to seek relationship, have in a sense always been lost from the get go and are trying to find home/safety/happiness/security via. the relationship, but the truth is, they can only find that if they return home.
The relationship does little to relieve this person of his background condition of being away from his home.
The interesting part here is, there is no good and bad apart from perspective.
This experience of being the outcast lost soul, can be seen as a unique and sublime experience by itself. It is the beauty of the sheer adventure of it and the extreme heights and risks such a person takes to find his comfort/security/happiness.
If I was a soul, if I was given a choice between a fully secure home connection vs. this adventure of disconnection and finding home, I could have very well chosen the latter happily.
After all, the happiness of home is only when you have traveled everywhere in deep insecurity and longing.