Total flexibility, adaptability, response-ability is the greatest freedom

RULE: “What appears is not what it really is.”
This is even easier to see the more disrupted things get.

Persistence makes it more difficult to see illusions,
Because the persistent stuff imposes itself on you,
Day after day in the same way, leaving very little gaps.

But disruptions make it more easy to see between the cracks.
To see that all that appears is empty,
And is the modulation of a substrate that is completely free to change.

In my opinion, the real truth is all mixed.
There is no black and white dichotomy of [good parent, terrible parent].
The world/creation is like a forest.
It can be seen in 1000s of ways,
And all of these ways are views of the same transcendental object.

The transcendental object we call world,
Is an infinite canvas for us to project and see what we want to see.
Just like a screen is.
It carries the potential in each of its pixels,
To show a huge range of brightness and color,
And consequently appear as any picture.

All is a complex mixture.
Nothing is a pure blessing or a pure curse.
There is duality in everything.
Flexibility of perspective/vision and response-ability,
Is the truest freedom imo.

All that appears is the play of Maya.
All is an appearance.
All that appears is not what it really is.
It is the flexibility of our mind that allows us to see more,
Of the transcendental higher dimensional object we call the world.

Like how 1000s of people take videos of a place using their own cameras,
We use our minds to perceive and understand different aspects of this world.
But the world (the place itself) is beyond all the footage that was captured.
The footage is a representation and not the thing itself.

The world is an unfathomable blend of 1000s of facets.
Our minds are like travelers and explorers of this multifaceted object.
How much we travel and explore is our choice,
And is also dependent on our potential.

When it comes to Maya,
The rule is always: “Do it the way it works”.

The inspiration from the void takes form

Inspiration is basically potential energy.
From the void, an inspiration takes a form,
And when the inspiration has completed its surge/influx,
The form drops back/returns to the ground of being/void.

Every in-breath is from an inspiration.
It reaches its cresendo/peak,
And then there is a full emptying of all that was gathered.
One then abides in the emptiness of breath,
Until the next wave of inspiration happens.

Like the milk getting heated from the flame of inspiration,
And swelling from that,
And when the flame of inspiration goes off,
The milk swell starts to lower, until it is level again.

Inspiration I feel is ever present like the air.
But I think it is the limitation of our form,
That it can only draw/hold so much before stopping all further reception,
And needing to empty first.

Existence in this form is therefore a duality,
Of the alternation of filling and emptying.

In theistic terms, when they say
‘god loves you’ Or ‘connect with love’,
I think it essentially means,
You are connecting with the energy that inspired your form.

So every form is from an inspiration.
It could however be in the process of waxing or waning.
Every form is an expression of a certain potential/possibility.
Life is this influx into form,
And Death is the return to the void.

A description of the Dark Night of the Soul

# Participation turns into Withdrawal
# Investment turns into Disinvestment
# Enchantment turns into Disenchantment
# Attraction turns into Disgust
# Love turns into Hate
# Passion turns into Dispassion
# Interest turns into Disinterest
# Attraction turns into Aversion
# Energy turns into Tiredness
# Ecstasy turns into Deep-Grief
# Gain turns into Loss
# Vitality turns into Depression
# Vibrance turns into Listlessness
# Activity turns into Inactivity
# Vigor turns into Torpor
# Order turns into Chaos
# Focus turns into Confusion
# Hope turns into Hopelessness
# Bliss turns into Dread
# Peace turns into Suffering
# Laughing turns into Crying
# Pleasure turns into Pain
# Meaning turns into Meaninglessness
# Quest towards life turns into Quest towards death
# Ambition turns into Apathy
# Happiness turns into Sadness
# Clarity turns into Fog
# Awakeness turns into Stupor
# Aliveness turns into Deadness
# Desire turns into Fear
# Reality turns into Appearance
# Truth turns into Illusion/Maya
# Flow turns into Resistance
# Light turns into Darkness
# Knowing turns into Unknowing
# Becoming turns into Unbecoming
# Good-Sleep turns into Sleeplessness
# Novelty turns into Tedium
# Prized-Assets turn into Burdens
# Health turns into Disease
# Relationships turn into Isolation/Desertion
# Growth turns into Decay
# Prominence turns into Fading/Invisibility
# Importance turns into Neglect
# Development turns into Stagnation/Atrophy
# Victory turns into Defeat
# Pride turns into Humiliation
# Independence turns into Dependence
# Thriving turns into Desperation

Programming, Judgment, Disowning, and Projection

You want to have sex or relations,
With the qualities that you are not identified with,
But want to include in yourself and identify with.

This would apply even to attractions to even what we refer to as negative.
For instance, say you are attracted to abusers, manipulators, selfish/exploitative, uncaring, angry others,
That means you like their “service to self” quality,
Which is something you would desire to include into yourself.
But it may be too difficult to own because of your heavy identification with its opposite.

Our soul is precisely attracted to the qualities of other souls,
Which we need to balance/null/neutralize/complete ourselves.
The flow chart would be something like this:
The programming structures -> Perception/Vision -> Judgment -> Disowning -> Projection of qualities (which become others).
Then we attract all others with that projected quality,
Because it is too difficult to own that in ourselves.
It would require a lot of transformation and rewiring to include those aspects too.

This applies to both what we judge as good and bad in others.
We may project the judged good qualities out, because we may believe we are not worthy of them.
We may project the judged bad qualities out, because we may hold on to an ideal of ourselves and these bad qualities may be ruining that ideal.

A quality may contradict the very identity we currently have.
So we judge -> disown -> and then project it.
So what this means is, all others are your own projected qualities.
All attraction or repulsion is from disowning.
However when these disowned qualities are witnessed as others, it creates resonance.
The resonance of aspects of ourselves we do not like = disliked ppl.
The resonance of aspects of ourselves we do like = liked ppl.

It is not that you “Actually Are” all the others you perceive.
Rather, you are your perception/experience of them, i.e. how ‘you’ see them.
You can only know them to the extent that you are willing to see,
Which is actually the same as your willingness to see and know yourself.

It is like the analogy of the ‘Blind men and the elephant’.
Each starts off at their point of view and explores/owns/projects their reality from there.
The ultimate reality is our true nature, but we ascend to that stage by stage in evolution.
It is every being’s deepest longing to realize this.

Duality is the Cyclic-engine that moves in Great time

car-moving

The wheels of your car go round and round.
The steering wheel turns side to side, back and forth.
The pedals of your car are pressed and unpressed.
The gears of your car cycle through their various positions.
The pistons in the engine of your care move up and down.
The crank shaft keep rolling.
The windows roll and move the glass up and down.
If you see everything about the working of your car is cyclic.

The relative non-cyclic aspect of the car is you the driver.
You may take it to various places.
Similarly, in existence too,
“Samsara = The great wheel = Cyclic time = Serves Maha-kala/non-cyclic time/the great time.
You could say “The great time” is the transcendent aspect of intelligence that RIDES the “cycles of samsara/cyclic time”.

Another analogy would be the cells in your body,
All have a cycle of existence right?
The cells reproduce, new cells are born,
The old ones pass away, the new ones reproduce again…and so on.
Each of these trillion cells is in a way serving you.
You are like the driver of the “Car”, build out of these cells.

The cyclic existence engine serves the the non-cyclic intelligence.
Samsara serves Nirvana.
Our birth-death is also a cycle/circle.
There is a seed that germinates into a tree,
Then the tree passes away,
And the seed once again sprouts when the season is right.
Spring = Birth/childhood
Summer = Adulthood
Autumn = Old age
Winter = Death
So birth and death can also be seen like a pendulum swing of life energies.
The great flight of birth and its crash of death.
LAW: “What learns from the cycle is always that which is beyond the cycle.”
Because a cycle is zero-sum.
So it can be deduced, that we may go through these cycles repeatedly until that which is beyond the cycle wakes up.
After that that which is beyond which has woken up is transcendent of the cycle it was in earlier.

Cells in each part of our body,
Channel a certain portion of body intelligence,
And perform a certain function(s).
Similarly it seems like each of us,
Channel a portion of the collective intelligence,
And perform a certain function.
What you are channeling can be felt in the form of your desires.
Your desires/inspirations are the driving force of your instrument.
The life energy descends and ascends alternately,
From form to formless…
The heart of the earth is pulsing humans in and out of existence,
As birth and death, with influx-deflux.

Also each desire force works within a polarity.
The diseased person desires and seeks health.
The poor person desires and seeks riches.
The intensity of this seeking is proportional,
To how deep he has polarized on either end.
The 2 ends go together.
So each desire has its own cycle,
Between the 2 poles of the duality-pair.
Duality pairs such as:
poverty-riches, disease-health, ignorance-knowledge and so on.
The pendulums keep swinging.

Desire therefore seems to be cyclic in its very nature.
Because desire for X implies X’.
And intensity of desire implies magnitude of X’.
For instance:
The more deep you are in suffering, the more deeply you desire joy.
So if someone is deeply craving joy, you can intuit how much he is suffering.
This is relative too.
For instance:
If you have seen -100, then you are seeking +100.
Whereas if you have only seen -20, then you are probably only seeking +20.
But if the whole cycle is seen, it is zero sum.

Maybe that is why the scriptures keep pointing to desirelessness.
Because desires are also identification with cycles.
Technically, transcendence is not desirelessness,
But it is moving to a higher order desire.
For instance, the planetary desire if we could sense it,
Would be far higher than our personal desire.

The ascent to Shiva and descent to Maya

The influx into the earth plane of density,
And the vacating of the earth plane of density,
Are like Shiva moving in and out of Prakriti/Maya/Matter.
This is birth and death.

Breathing/Heartbeat/Sex/Birth-Death,
Waking-Sleeping/Day-Night/Light-Darkness,
All of this goes in-out, in-out, in-out…
In a state of vibration.
Like a dazzling flashing strobe in consciousness.

At the microcosmic the vibrations are incredibly rapid,
While in the macrocosmic, the flux of day and night takes 24 hours say.
We find ourselves in the middle.
Macrocosmic(slower vibration) —“Us/We”— Microcosmic(faster vibration)
Maybe for the earth, each of our lifetimes is equal to a blink on an eye for it.
The life forms on earth would be like multicolored sparking,
And shimmering coming from a revolving diamond in the presence of light.

We are experiencing all of our lifetime in this unique perspective.
As a mote on earth, living what feels like around 85 years of lifetime.
What a wonder it is!,
When all of our life is seen from such an expanded perspective.

Positive and Negative Anima

Positive/Light Anima:
Pleasant, Kind, Warm, Watery, Friendly, Embracing, Including, Giving, Trusting, Pleasing, Requesting, Sincere, Innocent, Non-calculative, Freeing, Relaxed, Open-minded, Gentle, Soft-spoken, Expressive, Non-violent, Happy to learn, Listening, Admiring, Adoring, Thankful, Grateful, Having remorse when having wronged, Solution-oriented, Forgiving, Understanding, Enjoying other’s happiness, Safe, Reliable, Revealing, Genuine, Sweet, Forthright, Honest, Truthful, Goodwill, Cooperating, Nectar-filled, Healer, Well-wisher, Playful, Democratic, Charming, Agreeable, Nice, Likeable, Constructive, Keeps promises/word, Secure, Angel-like, Refined, Sophisticated, Fine, Filled with compassion, Drive to enhance life, Greek goddess Aphrodite like, Principled, Nurturer, Interested in God vs. false power, Truthful, Empath, Alluring, Ethical, Sunlight source, Benevolent, Mature soul, Light, Optimistic, Positive, Happy, Cherubic, Uplifting, Flexible, Yielding, Considerate, Abundant, Philanthropic, Heavens/Deva-lokas/Sky entity, Respects the other, Sane, Supportive, Responsible, Authentic, Growing, Adaptable, Easily Satisfiable/Pleasable, Open heart of air, Sharing self with other and other with self, Ready to serve.

Negative/Shadow anima:
Super severe, harsh, cold, dry, hostile, deserting, abandoning, withholding, mistrusting, punishing, commanding, tactful, calculating, measuring, controlling, imposing, dominating, demanding, repressing, violent, fake-confidence-mask, inflated-ego (looking down on everyone else), thankless/in-grateful/remorseless, defensive, vengeful, jealous, treacherous, deceitful, hiding/covering/occluding/pretending, vile, bitter, manipulative, resentful, hateful, nursing grudges, abusive, venomous, poisonous, wanting revenge, targeting people, playing politics games (like house of cards), ingratiating itself to authorities and people in power, nasty, cruel (can cut you off totally anytime), destroyer, betrayer (can entirely turn its back on you), sorcerer-like, crude, filled with pain and holding on and nursing it within herself, death drive (total withdrawal of the phantasy projections anytime), Goddess Kali like, asuric, demonic, witch, diabolical, devilish, looking to die and absorb itself into people more powerful (but all to execute its revenge), expert liar, psychopathic, creepy, sly, opportunistic, energy vampire, reptilian, snake like, dark, gloomy, depressive, melancholic, absolutely stubborn, rigid, stoic, in a deep feeling of lack, power hungry, exploitative, underworld/underground/dungeon entity, gas-lighting/crazy-making, madness, attacking, blaming, projecting, broody, mopey, whiny, complaining, fussy, sulky, cribby, unsatisfiable, unpleasable, devouring, self-obsessed/absorbed, closed heart of stone.

Intensify the cycles

space_mandala

Fully experience one pole to move to the other.
Then fully experience the other to move back to the first.
All of these polarities keep swinging:
Sadness ——– Laughter
Anger ———- Joy
Pain ———— Pleasure
Suffering ——- Peace
Fear ———– Love
If you withhold anything, then you cannot let the life flow.
Emptiness will not happen if you withhold, that which you hold will become real.
You have to enable/allow/facilitate the flow/passing/process.
Die continuously to keep living anew.

Fully experiencing is the only way to let life keep moving.
This also means fully experiencing ALL the cycles.
Everything must run through.
All the wheels/cycles must spin faster and faster,
Like the spinning ceiling fan, the cycles will form the mandala, and the transcendent vision will be seen.

The intensity of time is to be accelerated.
Time being a cycle, it intensifies the rapidity of the pendulum swing/cycles.
You need to increase your vision of time.
When time becomes extremely rapid, the 2 dualities separated in time, appear as the mandala.
Make the refresh rate of cycles so quick, that you can see the whole hologram.
Live as intensely as possible.
Experience as fully as possible.

Be like the Heptapods in the movie Arrival.
To see the vision of cyclical time over long reaches.
Fast-forward your life process.
Let the karmic wind up toy completely unwind and spiral outward to the next dimension.
Kala the darkness and ignorance of time must be overcome.

Whiz through all the residual memories of the past,
And relive them and burn them as intensely as you can.
Be as awake as you can.
Intensify the cycles. Go faster.
Finish off the karma residues.
Take in more fire, and burn faster and stronger.
Increase the frequency.
More intense the life process = Higher the plane one’s being ascends to.
Let your life move like a Timelapse.

Big Bang and Black hole

Big bang ——- Black hole
Birth ———- Death
Pure Greed —– Pure Fear
Ecstasy ——– Peace
Activity ——- Rest
Total expansion —- Total contraction
Breathing in ——- Breathing out
Light ————– Darkness
Relationship ——- Withdrawal

The pendulum of life swings between these poles.
That is the true existential part.
The rest is our freedom and our creation.

One pole is experienced from the other pole

Only a hellish human (internal condition) can experience heaven.
Only a heavenly human can experience hell.
Like how only a very hungry person enjoys food.
Your experience is the relationship between the polarities.
-ve -> +ve = heavenly experience.
+ve -> -ve = hellish experience.

Dualities/Polarities:
Pleasure pain
Ecstasy agony
Heaven hell
Security insecurity
Positive negative
Light darkness
Gratification torture
Power powerlessness
Strength weakness
Happiness grief
Gain loss
Healing injury
Attraction repulsion
Love hate
Joy suffering
Harmony chaos
Vitality depression
Comfort hardship
Exhuberance dullness
Ease disease
Rest unrest

Enjoy and ride each of these cycles.