Category: Insight

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The guru is really your own higher self

Projectionoflight

The greatest pain (that I have experienced) is of separation and disconnection.
Whenever a person is connected, one can see a beehive around them, i.e. all the people attracted to that connection to source energy.
Everyone needs/longs for this connection to live/survive/thrive, and therefore everyone seeks this, they are drawn to all the conduits that transmit the source power.
So when a person gets firmly connected, his extent of connection determines the attraction gravity he/she sets up.
The more powerful their connection, the larger their energetic influence, and more the people sitting in their shadow and gravity.

The opposite is seen, when there is total disconnection, the energy/power then of the person is even smaller than their own body, they simply struggle to survive, hold their own coherence.
In transformation, one can be completely reduced to pulp approaching a total chaos of the creative force (it depends on the extent of transformation that is happening).
Buddha, Jesus, Krishna, Vivekananda, Lao Tzu and all the greatest spiritual teachers in history have had enormous connection to source power.

But the degree of connection visible is only the smaller part of the truth.
Don’t judge a work in its unfinished state, esp. when it has been dismantled totally into an incoherent chaotic pulp.
It only appears like there is no connection, but one is closer to the light than ever before and one is being DONE in its image. Being transformed, being resurrected, being remade.
The total unknowing, dark night of the soul where you are blinded (none of your instruments help in this terrain), makes you understand that it is not by your efforts (what you call ‘you’) that this transformation is happening.
Infact ‘you’ yourself are being remade by a higher power.
Really, everyone is looking for a conduit to grace/god/divine/…
When your longing is deep enough, it eventually(in time, as a journey) carries you to the greatest connection/wisdom.
Deeper the longing = Greater the transformation = Greater the power/wisdom/vision/inclusion = Greater the connection = Greater the transcendence.
The longing is the potential energy that will unfold into kinetic transformation/manifestation.
It is a process of ENFOLDMENT(longing, potential, seed sprouting) -> UNFOLDMENT(actualization, kinetic, tree becoming).
All desires are potentials, and their flowering are the trees.
It is from the ground of filth that the beauty of a tree emerges.
Both filth and beauty have their divine purpose and go together.

The outer guru, is a catalyst, the hope, the potential coming/appearing, the becoming, in manifest form.
When you meet your guru, you see your own potential in its manifest state.
Your recognition of the guru, is your inner recognition of your own higher self and higher potential/possibility.
That recognition of your own higher potential (projected as the outer guru) results in the surrender/devotion that follows.

All manifest is a projection of the inner experience.
The guru is yourself, none other than your own higher self appearing to you as the guru.
Your recognition of the guru, is your recognition of your own higher self/possibility/your own higher potential.
And the surrender/devotion/work that follows is the projection of your own higher self consuming/taking you/transforming you/absorbing you into itself.

 

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The repression of the reality of death

There is a fundamental imbalance I have noticed as a pattern throughout civilization and society (the one around me now).
Death has not been integrated into Life.
We repress anything to do with death and handle it in a kind of desperate uneasy way, we shield the reality of this as much as we can and when it happens it carries the context of: “What an unexpected tragedy, this should not have happened, this is unfair and sudden, but I will have to do whatever I can to manage this (said despondently)”.
Why should this be the case?
Why is the collective repressing the reality of death?
That I feel is the true elephant in the room that is being repressed.
We all play/act and pretend like it does not exist and we have an implicit agreement to never speak or discuss it unless really needed and only to the extent required.

This collective repression and denial of the reality of death has consequences throughout the ways in which we live our lives.
Every aspect of our lifestyle carries this feature too.
Marriage/new relationships are celebrated, while breakups are looked down upon, like “There must be a mistake, this is really wrong, should not happen etc.”.
Even the word breakup carries such a violent unceremonious negative connotation.
How can creativity flow freely if things once acquired are simply frozen?
Both the processes of acquisition and dissolution are like 2 wings of the bird of freedom/change/creative flow.
We are actually stifling the movement of life by denying the reality of death, because they both need each other for the higher purpose which is flow, expression, and creation.

There is a similar situation with consumer products.
It is so easy to purchase products now with the whole global e-commerce now booming in the online sphere.
But it is at least 10 times more difficult to find information and sell what you already possess. It is even difficult to find useful ways to pass on what you have even free of cost in a way that someone else could benefit and use.
The information is not AS READILY available as when you want to purchase.
There is definitely a gigantic imbalance I see.
There is so much hype about the building of a new product, with all the marketing, first day sales etc.
But the phasing out of old products with proper burial (which in this case might mean, the dismantling and salvaging of all of its raw materials, and reusing or returning it to the environmental cycles efficiently) is not done.
Where does all the garbage go?
It is not recycled and put back to its right place.
There is a right place for everything.
Like even poop forms great manure for trees/plants etc.
So as a result of this, we have an endless accumulation of the garbage created by old products.
Who is going to do the cleanup?
The responsibility is on us, it is our willful ignorance and denial of the reality of death that is the root cause here.
We emphasize creation, but not the efficient passing on of the stuff we have gathered to the next generation, or the proper recycling of stuff back into the environment.
Deep inside, there is a denial of the reality of death, which manifests as a feeling that we will live forever. We never even CONSIDER the reality of our own death.
Only if we did that, would we put effort into the correct recycling of our possessions (RE-CYCLING is the key word, life and death is a cycle, and nature has its own cycles. Ideally we should study these cycles and work in harmony with them.)

This is a collective problem and also an individual problem, as I see it.
There are many other smaller instances of this pattern.
Most of us forward bend far more than backward bend in our lifestyles.
We focus on what to eat and treat it like a ceremony and ritual, but when it comes to poop, we want to get done with it with as little consciousness as possible.
We emphasize work/achievement/building but sideline aspects like relaxation/rest/deconstructing (or we do those things only to get back to our prime focus of work and use it instrumentally).
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Whose expectations determine our behavior and self?

Are others responding to what you expect from them? OR Are you responding to what others expect from you?
Are you conditioning others’ behavior? OR Are others conditioning your behavior?
Are we being the way we are because we are that way? OR as a response to what the other expects?
Are we ACTING or REACTING?
Do you expect to be treated a certain way? and that is why the other is simply fulfilling your own request? OR Are you simply behaving in accordance and taking on a role based on the other’s expectation?

These questions are like koans that lead you beyond.
Both sides are true.
Between the self and other, there is total mutual inter-relationship.
Deep psychoanalysis will at times tell you that if you are constantly abused then somewhere you are playing a 50% role of enabling it. You allow and attract such people and even allow their behavior because you want them to do that to you.
And the converse can also be explained. That if the other is a narcissistic bully he conditions your role i.e. to be a hostage for his rageaholic monologues etc.
So what is the truth?
Is your own expectation attracting such treatment? OR Is the bad other forcing you to behave that way to protect yourself?

Is our role and behavior in life conditioned by what others expect from us?
OR are others simply complying with what we expect from them?

Both are true and are simultaneous.
Since the mind can only grok one side at a time, we may bias ourselves to either seeing the self as responsible or other as responsible.
But in truth, both are happening simultaneously.
This simultaneity of occurrence cannot be grasped in one thought, it goes beyond the capacity of the linear mind to hold.
So we can examine only 1 at a time, but both are true.

cubes

From that higher level, we can see that there is only god.
The self, the other, their relationship, who is doing whom etc. is like the perspective puzzle of “Do you see 6 cubes or 7 cubes?”
The truth is – it is 6, it is 7, it is both, it is neither, all of the above, neither of the above, all of the above and beyond, neither of the above and beyond etc.
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Heal the world by healing your inner images

Disco-Violet-Light-Abstract-Art1

You see intention everywhere in everyone’s faces.
They more often than not ‘mirror’ your own intentions towards them in the unconscious.
Does everyone want you to die? OR Does everyone want you to live happily?
What is their intention? as you see it.
It often mirrors the intention you carry for them in your unconscious.
In the unconscious, “It is a tooth for a tooth”, what you carry is projected as such.
So the way to heal your outer world, is from the intent/relationship you carry to the inner image of the world.
To heal others, first heal and connect the inner images you carry about them to god.
That is the chasm that has to be bridged by raising intelligence/understanding.
Current world view/view of others ——–chasm———– God
The outer is only a mirror of the inner space happenings which is closer to the source.
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Pleasure is a relationship

pure-joy

Pleasure is from a “deep willingness” to “open/include/relate/connect/absorb/commune/merge” your “intelligence” with the other.
It is from the merging of 2 intelligences done willingly.
You “allow” yourself to “dance” and be “touched/moved/uplifted/transformed”.
This mutual interrelationship stirs the depths and plays a rhapsody.
There is a sense of timeless absorption, rapture, and bliss
This ecstasy of union is the highest pleasure.

 

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Experiential Reality needs no proof

There is no proof needed for experiential reality.
The experience and the proof are one.
Because proof is to simply add a certification/validation/confirmatory wrapper over the raw information.
It is an additive layer that gives validity to the whole package – furnishing the package with proof and consequently certifying its validity too.
In experiential reality, the seeing is either present or absent.
If present then no proof is needed, it is already ascertained.

To become aware of something new, is expansion and realization of consciousness itself.
You either see it (realize it) or you don’t.
It is your sensitivity to see it or not.
Most practices are only invitations/favorable conditions to sensitize you to seeing certain spaces/phenomena OR they awaken certain sensitivities lying below your current threshold.
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Fire the transformer

The principle of fire is within you.
Fire is the life force.
Fire + Space = Consciousness [Perception movement]
Fire + Air = Ordinary fire [Mind movement]
Fire + Water = Acid [Emotion movement]
Fire + Solid = Lava [Physical movement]
Fire is:
Destructive(if attached)——OR——Transforming(if non-attached)
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Are you sure you want to be healed/cured/healthy?

Lets really dive deep into this matter.
Everyone assumes that their desire is always for a greater, better, and nicer life filled with health, vitality, exuberance, joy, prosperity, and riches.
That is the collective assumption each person holds about their innermost motivations.
But really? Are you sure? Have you ever REALLY looked inside and asked yourself if that is what you really want?
Maybe you want to be sick? Maybe you want to be seriously sick? Maybe you want to punish yourself to death? Maybe you want to end this entire life, that is commit suicide (suicide as an attitude, not the act per say)? Do you want to live a ‘living death’?
Is your innermost motivation to die? and facilitate dying in every possible way by constantly attracting severe and hostile circumstances to your life?
This may sound morbid, but the truth can be quite eye-opening if this is really examined without ASSUMING stuff just because it sounds normal or good.
Do you really want to get alright? OR Is there much more going on than just simply believing that?

Lets consider the 2 basic orientations:
Life drive ——————- Death drive
Life drive moves towards enhancing life while fearing death.
Death drive moves towards enhancing death while fearing life.
In a way both are orientations based on fear of the opposite.

I’ll speak about a few cases here.
In childhood, were you the spoilt child or the lost child?
Spoilt child —————- Neglected child
The spoilt child lets say becomes a narcissist, which means there is great love for the ‘self’ (whatever structure it has formed), and there is a desire to enhance the self at all costs even if it means sacrificing and destroying others.
The child then endlessly looks for ways of self-aggrandizement, glorification, beautification, and better survival OR he may become a fire-starter, notorious, attract negative attention etc.
Why? Because they value that structure of self so much.
This is actually an internalization of the “positive or negative parent attention” that was received.
Even if his life circumstance becomes terrible, he may wish for the destruction of the world and other people, create justified rage for everything(rage = anger, and anger cannot be there, unless there is desire, and desire cannot be there unless there is love(in this case for the self)).
However, he would still work towards preserving and enhancing himself to the hilt from the love of the self-image.

The profoundly neglected child on the other hand receives no parental attention at all.
It tends to develops a self that acts more like a martyr and also operates in a primary mood of despair.
The despair of having to put in a bunch of efforts to constantly survive in order to protect a worthless self anyway.
The profoundly neglected child may get burnt out later from all his martyrdom, and then retreat more and more into hermetic isolation with profound hatred/detachment towards everyone and everything.
The deeper truth about this is that, the parental rejection of him/her in childhood has been internalized as the self (phantom critic self) which then subjects the ‘real self’ to the same neglect and hostile attitude(of endless deprivation, slow poisoning, condemnation and punishment).
The message internalized is “We dont want you, nobody needs you here, you are a waste, you don’t deserve to exist, why don’t you just die and relieve us of the burden of having you around?”

Let’s talk more about the latter case.
Because narcissistic personalities abound in society and have been studied quite a bit.
But what has not received attention in my opinion are the silent people on the periphery living on the boundary between life and death – the profoundly neglected folk.

It does not matter how smart or erudite they may seem.
In fact more often than not, they are extremely knowledgable and intelligent too.
They become so, from all their efforts to overcome their own impossible inner critic.
The death drive(internalized phantom self critic), drives them to the height of accomplishment, but no amount of accomplishment is remotely enough for the death drive to be released.
That is why they are just assaulted from every direction with a sense of hopelessness, abandonment, isolation, despair, futility, pain no matter what they do, all of which only serves as distractions from avoiding the true harshness of their underlying condition.
It may lead to:
– compulsive isolation (because that is the only thing that feels safe), daydreaming, fantasy
– OR compulsive busyness
– OR martyrdom in the form of service for others
– OR belief in some kind of myth like “knowledge will free me” or “perfection in obeying laws is the answer” etc.
– OR may become a pleasure seeker.
There are different ways of coping with this condition, but the underlying cause is from “internalization of the rejecting neglecting other (parental figures or caregivers etc.)”
Nothing can redeem the ‘fallen self’ from the eyes of this ‘critical phantom self’. This phantom self is ruthlessly punishing and tormenting – so much, that the only real wish of the living self is for death which sets up the death drive.

So, if your condition is of the ‘neglected rejected self’ and if your ‘internalized myths’ are similar, then “failure = success”.
Changing your diet, lifestyle, doing yogic practices, exercise, herbs etc. whatever you do may not really REMOVE this shape shifting tyrannical monster that torments you from within.
Because the origin of the condition is from the MYTHIC level of consciousness.
Find out the root of your self-rejection.
It takes immense courage to face up to it, because all the other stuff actually is more of a distraction and patch-work compared to the true work of understanding the matrix of your own innermost intentions.
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Stillness is relative, Analogies from astronomy

Stillness is relative.
You achieve stillness when you move at the same speed as the object you wish to have still in your vision.
To attain stillness with life, you have to move at the same speed as life.
This is done by ‘allowing’ all motion to happen.
In totally allowing yourself to be moved, your experience becomes still.
Since everything is moving, there is no absolute still point to observe from.
When you move in total alignment with the movement of god’s will(the will of the WHOLE}, creation appears STILL.

Lets take some general examples to fire up our wonder and imagination.
star-trails

When you stand on earth, you are moving along with the earth(i.e. moving along with the frame of reference of the earth), therefore the earth(ground/scenery) appears to be still while the sky contents seem to be moving (stars moving, sun moving, moon moving, planets moving etc.).
Therefore to see the contents of the earth from a still point of view, you need to move with the earth.

space-station-view

Whereas if you stood still in the sky (i.e. a fixed point in the space, like say you were looking from a non-orbiting fixed space station close to the earth), the earth under you would be whirling at 28km/sec, while the sky contents would remain relatively still.

Generally the concept of objectivity refers to precisely this, to observe a system from a point of view that is outside of the system itself.
Because from a point of view outside of the system, the whole system can be observed as an “Object”. That is why the term “Objective”.

solarsytem

Similarly when observing the solar system, you have to move along with the whole solar system itself(i.e. move at the same speed as the entire solar system as it goes around the milky way) to have the solar system appear still in your vision.

There are profound implications to the metaphors/analogies presented above.
For instance, say you are perfectly indoctrinated into a religion.
Then that religion would become fixed for you, would appear still and eternal, as eternal truth, while everything else, such as the world, other people, other systems of belief etc. would seem to all revolve/change around this central frame of reference and appear empty.
This is similar to being on Earth (seeing Earth as real/ever-present) and viewing Venus in the sky as a passing possibility that comes up as a bright dot and goes back under the horizon. While the residents in Venus(would see Venus as real/ever-present) would see earth like a dot that moves in a certain way in the sky and vanish.
Each one would see their reality as real/truth/eternal/ever-present, and the other’s reality as a changing/empty arising-passing phenomena.

So if each one sees the changing outer world through the structure of his fixed eyes, then who is seeing the truth?
Again here, truth is relative.

earthvenussun

For instance, an entity on Earth can see Venus from its point of view.
An entity on Venus can see Earth from its point of view.
But an entity that is outside of the solar system can see the entire solar system from its point of view. Which means this entity sees the patterns of both Earth and Venus, and the dance between them, and the interactions of other planets with them, and this is something that the ones on Earth or Venus cannot see OBJECTIVELY because they themselves are moving.
So is the entity outside of the solar system seeing greater and vaster truth compared to the ones on Earth or Venus? Yes!
Similarly an entity outside of the Milky Way can see the entire Galaxy and all its patterns, and this would be an even greater point of view than the entity that was outside the solar system.

milky-way

Interestingly all the entities see an INFINITE PICTURE of INFINITE COMPLEXITY.
So there is a sort of fractal/holographic nature to this whole thing.
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Some of the vain myths that may occupy the sexual chakra

LOC = level of consciousness (a term taken from the ‘David Hawkins calibrated Levels of consciousness’)

PART 1: Attraction to LOC 150-175:
Shame core -> Outer raging (to hide the shame).

They believe they are already rejected/shamed, their heart is closed and does not see, but rather only projects its inner reality outward.
Then from that vision, all they see is their hated objects, and they rage at it and try to prove to the world that they are worthy.
They punish everyone else who is attracted to them, by “impossible demands” -> purposely to take out the rage.
It is a “vengeance” life. All of their outer life is about proving to the world their worth and being vengeant towards the world.
This is purposely done, so that intimacy is never achieved.
They prove in a self-fulfilling prophecy: “[internal shame + internal distrust of the world + They believe the world is unfair/not good] -> and then project that vision, and then rage/attack at it for not being so while also trying to prove to the world that they are worthy/good/deserve acceptance and love”.
This is a fractal of the [150-175] life negative LOC and it is “self-centeredness/selfishness” only.

I actually love them for their truth, and I can feel myself really wanting to heal their shame by somehow getting through all their attacks, reaching their core and then resurrecting them, and opening their heart.
I feel a strong urge to pass through all their brutal attacks with increasing intensity like a brave martyr/warrior, believing that if I somehow withstood it and reached the core, I could actually reach ‘where they are’ and resurrect that.
But since their heart is closed, the closer I get, I am only more viciously attacked and I have to ultimately retreat, because even if I did reach the core it is futile/pointless.
Their heart is closed, and they are not open to receiving.
The real reason why I abandon pursuit is when I see the futility of it, at that time, I just drop everything.
So all the sexual pursuit and putting up with the abuse, only leads to despair/futility at the end.
These people are actually extremely transparent and simple, there are only 2 layers to them: SHAME on the inside, and emanation of RAGE on the outside.

If you are attracted to a girl or guy with this pattern,
The VAIN MYTH here is that: The person can be resurrected if I tolerate their increasing rage on me until I reach their core and redeem them.
But this is a rescue fantasy again, because only THEY THEMSELVES can release their shame and heal themselves.
I will die a vain death by going into the rage fully. That is why I oscillate between the libido for sacrifice and bearing pain vs. the futility of all of it (ambivalent libido).
The promise of rescue is an illusion and therefore the mission of possible martyrdom and going into the rage is in vain.
Only when they want to heal truly, can the healing happen.
No force in the universe can make them heal otherwise.
A closed heart can only heal if it decides to open itself.
Until then nobody else can open it.
This is the law of: Respect the free will of beings, it can never be breached.
Nobody can ever open a closed-heart, it will only open when it is ready.

PART 2: Attraction to LOC 100-125:

Characteristics: “Dissociated” nihilism mindset of cluelessly fawning and taking refuge under everyone else.
Dissociation, Lostness, Numbness, Fear, Fawning.
The myth of: Rescuing the helpless lost waif, princess in distress.

Here they numb themselves out of reality and live in a dissociated space where everything looks numb and equivalent (nihilism).
The attraction here is to save/rescue/’be the savior’ of the lost/mad soul who has lost its way.
Here again, it cannot be saved, unless it WANTS to be saved.

So the VAIN MYTH here is of:
Rescuing the one who does not want to be rescued, by giving various discourses about ‘truth and themselves’ and teaching them how to see.
Again free will trumps here.
You can only help/save/rescue/’be a savior’ if the person wants to be rescued in the first place.
Only when they have reached that level of maturity and growth will they be willing. Until then you must let them be.
They cannot be forcibly dragged into truth, and must choose it out of their own free will.
Only WHEN WILLING, can they be saved and anyways there would be no resistance/suffering/problems/struggle at all if that were the case.