About Kundalini

I read that there are 3 stages of enlightenment:
# Stage 1: Gautam Buddha is behind you as a shadow.
# Stage 2: The Buddha comes in front of you, and you become the shadow.
# Stage 3: There is no more of you – not even a shadow, only the Buddha is.
(more information is available on this if you google it)

The kundalini initiates all 3 of these stages.
Kundalini is the “ascension energy” itself.
The “returning to source” movement from base to the crown chakra and beyond (not literal physical location, but more in terms of shifting of energy density from gross to subtle).
Spiritual seeking (the true kind) is from kundalini basically.
Kundalini is present in everyone but dormant, that is why this process is called kundalini awakening and kundalini rising.
Though I say “base to the crown”, the actual process is mystical and non-linear, not a linear flow from base to top in terms of physical location.
That is only for the purpose of symbolic representation.
Kundalini is like the stored source energy(potential) that serves as a vehicle to carry you back to source, it is the agency of transformation.

The concept of transcendence and spirituality does not even occur or appeal to someone whose kundalini is still dormant.
A sincere longing and seeking appears only after kundalini awakens.
Else there is no desire or any interest in such stuff, and such subjects.
The longing to transcend is the desire/potential, the force that makes you explore/seek/do sadhana is the kinetic/action.
That dormant potential that carries to the next dimension is the kundalini shakti.

It is like the upward current that carries you to a lower density, as your being receives greater energy.
Higher the energy = lower the density, like the molecules of gases have a lot more energy than liquids and solids.
Going up to lower density planes means, there is new information, new perception, new laws that are intuited, which are all the unfamiliar new terrains that are passed through in this process.
The “dark night of the soul”, is a stage in this kundalini ascension process, especially applies if you move very rapidly.
You can only move as fast as the amount of ‘loss’ you can handle and process.

So to recap the main points:
Kundalini is a symbolic system which represents the power/vehicle/fuel that carries you through the process of transcendence to lower densities planes from your current higher density plane.
This process is that it is highly mystical, non-linear, and beyond our understanding, at a level of mystery that is similar to life, birth, and death itself.

My Longing

longing

I feel a longing in direct experience, but it is hard to describe it.
Here is my attempt to come close to describing it:
Longing for God
Longing for Rest
Longing to Relax
Longing for Disappearance
Longing for Deep Sleep
Longing for Ecstasy
Longing for the Infinite
Longing for Release
Longing for Liberation
Longing for Wholeness
Longing for Integration
Longing for Silence
Longing to be released from the Body
Longing to be released from Identity
Longing to know ‘What I Am’
Longing for Flow
Longing for Death
Longing for Peace
Longing for Love
Longing for Understanding
Longing for Purpose
Longing for Revelation
Longing for Freedom
Longing for Bliss/Pleasure
Longing for Clarity
Longing for Mystery
Longing for the Beyond
Longing for Surrender
Longing for Truth
Longing for Light
Longing for Inspiration
Longing for Connection

The creative void/Brahman

No experience I have ever had could be otherwise.
Everything is exactly the way it is, and experience is free-falling from the void and returning to it.
“I myself” as an apparent controller/agent am an appearance and part of this free-fall of experience.
It is as if life(manifest) spills out from death and returns to death(void) – The creative void.
This creative void endlessly spills out movies of experience and apparent subjects and points of view.
Also the world, other people, objects are all arising in consciousness which is the real substance all of it is made up of.
Consciousness or the manifest arises from this creative void – like a media player visualization.
This creative void has no substance, or nature, or form. Just as your eyes should not have any color in order that you see all outer colors clearly (else if your eye itself were tinted with a color, then everything would appear to take that color) – similarly, the Brahman/creative void is qualityless, quantityless, substanceless, natureless, formless.
The creative void is truly “Nothing” and “Everything” that is manifest now, is only 1 of its boundless/infinite possibilities.
The creative void/Brahman is even beyond concepts of ONENESS and INFINITY, because both of those are subtle mentations/ways of seeing, and that is only one of the possibilities of the creative void.
I can endlessly describe the creative void, but none of the descriptions ARE IT, because each description is only one of the forms of this void.
All that I write about is about the mystery of this creative void. It is a celebration of its mystery and wonder.

Pondering on “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists.”

This aphorism is deeply intriguing to me.
It points at such a profound truth that I can intuitively grasp, but to touch this truth to all of my experience and to understand all of its implications is an endless fascinating contemplation.

I wonder about what this “no-thing thing” is.
This question makes me look.
The deeper I look, the more I silence myself to see finely (like how we hold our breath when threading a needle)
I am trying to silence myself enough to see the substrate space.
At a point, I can see, that along with what I am looking at, I am looking at my own looking.
I then see that, this looking is my own desire, the deepest desire in me, to feel and know the ultimate reality.
So me as the whole having a desire to look at itself (awareness turning back and seeing itself), is a desire like any other, that appears and passes.
Which means, this whole quest to know the ultimate reality is from my own deep desire.

This has mind-boggling implications of the impossibility of me knowing anything.
If all knowing and knowledge accumulation is driven by desire (the desire/heart drives the tuning into that particular manifestation of reality), and if desires appear and pass like all phenomena, then my very ground is swept off my feet.
Reality is even more crazily mysterious than I had previously considered.
So then, the quest of mine to find the ultimate ground is in itself driven by a specific desire, and therefore the manifestation that I paradoxically do by non-doing, is not the ULTIMATE GROUND of experience but rather a ‘Specific experience’.

On the negative side: Everything can be threatened. I mean EVERYTHING.
On the positive side: The truth/real can never be threatened. So nothing of true value is ever lost.

So what is the TRUE REAL? – it is inconceivable, ineffable, unimaginable, unfathomable, undetectable, unnoticeable, un-objectifiable, insubstantiateable. It is “…THAT…”.