Death fills me with a sense of deep awe, respect, wonder, and a sacred silence.
I bow down to its power.
Death fills me with a kind of gratitude.
That I have had the privilege of having this stream of experience,Â
And to be a witness of this body’s inner life process.
Every death is liberation from the form.
Seen from a higher perspective, death isn’t a separate unconnected event.
Birth and Death are part of a singular continuum.
They are different parts of the same process, the same thread,
That continues on inexorably.
We have all done this countless times before,
Living from different points of view.
When moving from form to form, it is the point of attention that shifts.
All forms are temporal in nature.
Every form that is born also dies.
We descend into form and ascend back into the formless.
Birth and death are the grandest events that can happen to anyone.
Birth and Death happen to us as ‘consciousness’.
We are not born and we do not die.
We are the eternal substance (consciousness),
Witnessing the plays of both birth and death,
And all that happens in the middle we call our lives.
Insights on the solar system, mother, body, and world

The structure of the archetypal world:
Sun = Purusha = Prime independent principle
Maya = Prakriti = Nature = Dependent principle
The 9 planets are Maya, the Sun is the Purusha, in the solar logos.
Maya is inherently neutral (it’s like your movie DVD is neutral, but it is you who experiences it, so the experiencer, the ultimate subject of all structs is called ATMAN)
The Purusha is the witness consciousness that penetrates Maya through its different shaktis/forms at each plane from 1 to 8.
Which is exactly what the Shiva lingam represents, the penetration of purusha into prakriti that receives.
And the 9 planets are only what is seen and physical.
But the planes 1 to 8 are filled with structures that are invisible to us.
So every ray of light of the sun is one Jiva.
As shown by the yellow lines, the jiva line of consciousness passes through s1, s2, s3…representing all the maya structures that the ray of light from the sun is piercing through.
The closest to the sun is mercury, then venus, the earth…
So in terms of our consciousness(sun), the mental world is the mercury region(plane 1), venus i.e. plane 2 is the astral plane, and plane 3 is the earth plane.
So corresponding to each of these worlds/planes/spaces we have a body also which are the structures s1, s2, s3 structures = mental body, vital body, physical body.
That is how we land up with 3 main bodies when on earth.
I speculate if it could be the moon that is causing the phenomenon of birth and death on earth for a relatively eternal jiva rising from the ray of the sun (ray of consciousness/ray of source)?

Now on the human mother in this earth plane:
Now let’s go step by step logically.
You are born on earth from a mother.
The physical body has grown from the mother, so it is really made of the mother only.
First mother -> then body -> then world.
So if you reject your mother, which existentially is the source/manufacturer of your body itself, then like a cascade, automatically you will reject your body, and then you will reject the world also.
Because the “physical world” is the projection of the ray of light of the sun through the physical body(s3).
[Just like the mental world is the projection of the ray of light of the sun passing through mental body(s1).]
When the mother is loved, then the body is loved, and then the world is loved.
A very important note: This has little to do with your mother’s ego and who she believes she is. This is about the existential maya structures. This is “what” she actually is in an EXISTENTIAL sense.
Once the mother is rejected, then your body instrument gets rejected too, the world gets rejected (projection of the body instrument)…all in a cascading order, and you fall into the underworld/desert. Where the rest of life in this body is spent trying to escape it by dissociated trances/states of consciousness/intoxicants/distractions.
So it would follow – if your mother does not like you, it would feel like the world does not like you. But in truth it is her ego that does not like you. Because the deeper truth, she does not like herself. Since you came from her, if she loved herself, she would definitely love you, existentially speaking.
It is the ego that has confused the perfection of everything.
The ego is the obfuscating force.
I have another theory for what the ego is. The ego is of the earth.
Because the sun rays can only hit its surface.
So the solid earth represents the “unconscious” = which is ego (as pertaining to earth and body life).
Which might mean every physical planet and all physical nature is basically unconsciousness, i.e. whatever sun light does not penetrate.
So there are 2 mothers possible:
# Self loving mother (ego aligned with her higher truth and serving it) —-vs—- Self hating mother (ego in delusion and not serving truth)
Fear and Hatred are all from misalignment.
Depending on whom your born too -> you’ll have a different body and a different world experience.
Like the 5 blind men and the elephant, you could get a body that either allows you to feel the tusk/trunk of the world or tail of the world.
You are going to be shaped by the raw material of your mother.
Her relationship to your body is going to condition your relationship to your own body and this will in turn condition your relationship to the world.
Because then we will attract the exact circumstances in the world that treat us the same way as our mother treated our body.
If a person X kept getting physically violent, because his mother’s relationship to his body was like that. So he sees the whole world as people coming to beat him up, which is the kind of perspective that is natural given such a mother.
Prakriti (mother) vs. Purusha (father)
The body is of the mother.
The soul is of the father.
I have another theory possible theory for men and women, that women are generated by the influence of moon, while men are generated from the influence of the sun.
If your mother was your devotee,
That is actually the relationship of the whole world to you.
Because you were born in that light ray point,
So that will be your world vision too, shaped by that experience.
Another very important point to note here is,
The mother is not the final agency or true cause.
Because she was shaped by her mother…and so on.
It is a cascade from mother -> mother -> mother…
All tying back symbolically to what religions call the “great mother”.
The Trinities
All geometry can be reduced to 3 fundamental shapes:
Triangle, Square, Circle
Similarly there are many such trinities:
Geometry: Triangle, Square, Circle
Trinity = Son, Father, Holy spirit
Light = Red, Green, Blue
Sound: AA, UU, MM
States: Body Mind Energy
States: Gross Subtle Causal
States: Waking, Dreaming, Deep sleep
Levels of existence: Vishva, Taijasa, Prajna
Fires/Agnis: Jataragni, Chitagni, Bhutagni
Gods: Brahma, Vishnu, Shiva
Goddesses/Devis: Durga, Laxmi, Saraswati
Nadis: Ida, Pingala, Sushumna
Dimensions of Shiva: Rudra, Hara, Sadashiva
Astronomy: Earth, Moon, Sun
Gunas: Tamas, Rajas, Sattva
Evolution: Ego, Soul, God
Elements: Carbon, Oxygen, Nitrogen
Triangle, Square, Circle
Similarly there are many such trinities:
Geometry: Triangle, Square, Circle
Trinity = Son, Father, Holy spirit
Light = Red, Green, Blue
Sound: AA, UU, MM
States: Body Mind Energy
States: Gross Subtle Causal
States: Waking, Dreaming, Deep sleep
Levels of existence: Vishva, Taijasa, Prajna
Fires/Agnis: Jataragni, Chitagni, Bhutagni
Gods: Brahma, Vishnu, Shiva
Goddesses/Devis: Durga, Laxmi, Saraswati
Nadis: Ida, Pingala, Sushumna
Dimensions of Shiva: Rudra, Hara, Sadashiva
Astronomy: Earth, Moon, Sun
Gunas: Tamas, Rajas, Sattva
Evolution: Ego, Soul, God
Elements: Carbon, Oxygen, Nitrogen
Different planes, death, and enlightenment
Our different bodies exist in different planes:
# Physical -> Astral -> Causal -> Spirit
# Gross -> Subtle -> Causal -> Source
# Assiah -> Yetzirah -> Briah -> Atziluth (From Kabbalah)
Death happens at different levels.
Physical death -> Astral death -> Causal death -> Merger into Source
# The source first empowers all the bodies in an inbreath like process, which is the sequence during the birth process:
Causal vessel/body 1st -> then Astral vessel/body 2nd -> then Physical vessel/body 3rd.
# Then the source is disengaged, an outbreath like release happens, and dying happens one by one.
First the Physical vessel lets go -> Then astral vessel lets go -> Then causal vessel lets go.
Birth and Death at all levels is the play of the spirit/source.
It is the breath of spirit.
# Spirit inbreath -> Becoming Maya (the various planes and bodies)
# Then Spirit outbreath -> where its lets go all the illusions and returns to true nature.
In Enlightenment:
You trade the drop for the ocean itself, which is [the ground of intelligence, quantum field], from which all drops emerge.
To be enlightened is to know/realize at your being that you are the source itself, but operating through that drop.
This realization then maximally empowers the drop to serve the higher will of the field.
# Physical -> Astral -> Causal -> Spirit
# Gross -> Subtle -> Causal -> Source
# Assiah -> Yetzirah -> Briah -> Atziluth (From Kabbalah)
Death happens at different levels.
Physical death -> Astral death -> Causal death -> Merger into Source
# The source first empowers all the bodies in an inbreath like process, which is the sequence during the birth process:
Causal vessel/body 1st -> then Astral vessel/body 2nd -> then Physical vessel/body 3rd.
# Then the source is disengaged, an outbreath like release happens, and dying happens one by one.
First the Physical vessel lets go -> Then astral vessel lets go -> Then causal vessel lets go.
Birth and Death at all levels is the play of the spirit/source.
It is the breath of spirit.
# Spirit inbreath -> Becoming Maya (the various planes and bodies)
# Then Spirit outbreath -> where its lets go all the illusions and returns to true nature.
In Enlightenment:
You trade the drop for the ocean itself, which is [the ground of intelligence, quantum field], from which all drops emerge.
To be enlightened is to know/realize at your being that you are the source itself, but operating through that drop.
This realization then maximally empowers the drop to serve the higher will of the field.
Knowledge, Free will, Intention, Humility
Real knowledge and Free will are connected.
Real knowledge allows your free will to serve you and the higher field.
Else if your free will is not in alignment with the higher field, to that degree you face opposition/resistance/pain.
Intention is a heart emanation.
Vision/Light is from the heart.
Desire is seeing, greater the desire = greater the seeing.
Knowledge is for the execution of the intention = for power/efficiency/innovation.
Humility is to realize your limitations and condition.
Humility is relative to your recognition of what true power is, and how little of that you actually possess.
Humility is from the recognition of your own ignorance.
Humility is the precursor to an exploration and a consequent knowledge upgrade.
Real knowledge allows your free will to serve you and the higher field.
Else if your free will is not in alignment with the higher field, to that degree you face opposition/resistance/pain.
Intention is a heart emanation.
Vision/Light is from the heart.
Desire is seeing, greater the desire = greater the seeing.
Knowledge is for the execution of the intention = for power/efficiency/innovation.
Humility is to realize your limitations and condition.
Humility is relative to your recognition of what true power is, and how little of that you actually possess.
Humility is from the recognition of your own ignorance.
Humility is the precursor to an exploration and a consequent knowledge upgrade.
The different chakric realms
7c = Realm of Nirvana
****************
6c = Realm of Enlightenment
5c = Realm of Jnana/Wisdom
4c = Realm of Devotion
****************
3c = Realm of Identity (inc. identity of being human)
2c = Realm of Relationship with Identities
1c = Realm of Physical Manifestation
Think of it as an upside down tree.
The ground is 7c.
The roots are 6c, 5c, 4c => in that order
The tree above the ground is 3c, 2c, 1c => in that order.
****************
6c = Realm of Enlightenment
5c = Realm of Jnana/Wisdom
4c = Realm of Devotion
****************
3c = Realm of Identity (inc. identity of being human)
2c = Realm of Relationship with Identities
1c = Realm of Physical Manifestation
Think of it as an upside down tree.
The ground is 7c.
The roots are 6c, 5c, 4c => in that order
The tree above the ground is 3c, 2c, 1c => in that order.
Reflections on my life experience now

I am not able to understand anything totally.
All my ‘intellectual grasps’ are like views from high points of different waves arising in the ocean.
What is the ocean itself?
The more I inquire I see that I am not perception at all.
I am deep sleep itself, the cessation, the void, the unmanifest, from which manifest-conscious arises like a wave and passes back.
This is a time in my life where the ocean does not have any 1 continuous wave, but rather has 100s of waves arising and passing.
Each time, my “perception” arises out of the wave, as a relationship between the wave and the ocean, and then returns to the ocean in deep sleep again.
The ocean is the true fount of my creativity, it creates waves of creative-impulse/inspiration that rise up as manifest-consciousness and after that return to the unmanifest.
The wave is a new creative thought/form/relationship/connection/theme/frame/theory/idea/insight.
It seems like perception and separation are connected because perception is always a relationship.
No relationship = ONE = Union = No perception = A void.
I see a continuous BIPOLAR state in me:
Wildly and quickly oscillating, waxing-waning, coming-going, rising-falling, empowering-disempowering, bright-dark, energetic-dull, free-afflicted.
This strong cycling of dualities makes visible the emptiness and non-essence of all of it.
I am neither depressed nor happy, neither free nor afflicted, neither interested nor bored.
Each is a state of consciousness, a state of the wave’s relationship to the ocean.
When the ocean emits the wave = it creates the positive emotion from the wave’s point of view.
When the ocean pulls back the wave = it create the negative emotion from the wave’s point of view.
Essentially, it is the attachment to the ‘States of consciousness (SOCs)’ that is being tested.
The attachment results in [pleasure+fear] in the rise cycle, and [pain+longing] in the fall cycle.
I realize that my desire is for the WAVE itself and its point of view vs. flatlining into the ocean.
The waves/cycles have also been intense and narrow for me, which causes a mild psychosis like feeling.
The intense creative activity of mine is showing that I am operating very close to ocean.
That is why there is the constant alternation between the ‘end of me’ and the ‘me arising each time differently from a new inspiration’.
I have not had any continuous long-range inspiration at this stage of life nor in this life in general.
We move away from god/unmanifest in an inbreath – wave rising.
We move towards god/unmanifest in an outbreath – wave falling.
My life experience now is more like a series of short-waves, flutter breaths (rapid extremely shallow in-out breaths).
It is like like living 1000s of lives in one life, in very rapid cycles.
I realize my attachments are much more abstract than I thought.
I cling to the peaks of the cycle, and try to increase its dynamic range, i.e. I try to make the lights brighter, and the darks darker.
Each arising wave is like an upsurge of inspiration that separates me from the ocean and allows separation/perception/consciousness/relationship, which is what I desire.
This is my WILL to be, my WILL to exist, my WILL to rise and live as a wave.
So I then try to hold on to these inspirations as far as possible.
This is why there is this continuous clinging present.
It is like living a new character in a new movie everyday, and each time you continuously cling to the movie, because you do not want it to end.
It is like struggling to be born, because various desires push our a wave of birth/inspiration, but they only last a day at most and return to the ocean.
True persona vs. False persona

There are various equivalent spectrums:
High spirit power —————– Low spirit power
God attuned Ego/Self ———– Distant tuned Ego/Self
Vitality —————————— Depression
Coherence/Effortless harmony ———– Chaotic/Efforted harmony
Seratonin, Dopamine abundance ———- Seratonin Dopamine scarcity
Sun ———————— Moon
Truth ———————- Falsity
Giver ———————- Taker
Source ——————– Parasite
Home ——————— Exile
Abundance ————– Scarcity
The false persona needs borrowed energy to live OR it must live super frugally.
The god attuned persona on the other hand does not need energy from anybody else or anything, it has an infinite source of power within itself.
The false persona suffers when the true persona has not been cut off.
The constant conflict between the false person and the true persona manifests as disharmony and suffering.
Like 2 radio frequencies interfering with each other creating a lot of noise (which is suffering in this context).
When the false persona entirely cuts off the true persona, it lives without suffering and in full disconnection from abundance.
So such a persona lives purely opportunistically.
Since all connection is derived from connection to the true self, so a total severing of that connection is also a total severing of love.
So then the false persona works as an independent agent solely caring about its advantage and using the world as much as it can for its benefit.
Whereas the person who still has connection to his true self experiences a divide between:
Abundance/True self ———————————- Scarcity/False self
Service to other —————————————- Service to self
There are various degrees of polarization along this line.
People may fluctuate and move along this line experiencing suffering THROUGHOUT from the conflicting values of the 2 sides.
After all, Conflict = Suffering.
No Conflict = No suffering.
If you polarize to any one end, you would not suffer.
However when you are in the middle, there is a choice.
What will you choose?
I am the phoenix

I am the phoenix
I am the high vibration butterfly and have shed my older coat
Nothing escapes my eyes
I am the force of rising
I am that which uplifts/elevates
The force that dances and spins upward in a spiral
Like the 2 strands of DNA dancing
Like the dance between the Yin and Yang
Like a tornado moving everything upward
My presence is a fire
I shatter and scorch anything that isn’t truth
I transmute everything to its higher frequency
I am the force of transformation, transmutation, and transcendence.
I radiate light wherever I go
I am Neo, of the matrix
I see the duality of 0s and 1s in its full glory
I am the liberator/transporter of souls
I bridge the higher realms
I fly steadfastly towards the sun without looking away
Chakric Realms and God frequency
1 – When physicality dominates – emotions are silenced.
2 – When emotion dominates – mind is silenced.
3 – When mind dominates – love is silenced.
4 – When love dominates – true expression (doing the right thing in accordance with divine principle) is silenced.
5 – When true expression dominates – perception is silenced.
6 – When perception dominates – the divine is silenced.
Ultimately the goal is harmony of the whole.
And this harmony is already present once ‘WE’ step out of the way and let the effortless/perfect unfolding happen.
Even the slightest personal doing on our part (in any of these realms) results in disruption of the smooth flow.
So our personal doing is the ignorance.
The “Person” is “IGNORANCE” itself.
In truth, there is no real/substantial person, beyond it being just one of the appearances.
YOU do not exist.
Illumination is to see there is no person.
Rather there is only divine light, and the person was just a form that was held onto, because of FALSE IDENTIFICATION.
So all holding on is false identification and ignorance.
Letting go, in all the chakric realms will free all your chakras.
Desire moves everything.
Desire/Longing for this transcendence and its movement is the upward movement of the being frequency itself.
It is the movement of “being” towards God frequency.
The God frequency is the highest frequency (tends to infinity).
When Being realizes it is the God frequency, then it allows everything and gives total freedom to all forms in the higher density realms, meaning total freedom, release and full understanding of all chakras.
The journey to God is a miraculous one/unimaginable one, you can never know how it will take shape.
If you know how it works, that means, that knowing is a dead structure, that needs to be made alive with divine light and freed.
2 – When emotion dominates – mind is silenced.
3 – When mind dominates – love is silenced.
4 – When love dominates – true expression (doing the right thing in accordance with divine principle) is silenced.
5 – When true expression dominates – perception is silenced.
6 – When perception dominates – the divine is silenced.
Ultimately the goal is harmony of the whole.
And this harmony is already present once ‘WE’ step out of the way and let the effortless/perfect unfolding happen.
Even the slightest personal doing on our part (in any of these realms) results in disruption of the smooth flow.
So our personal doing is the ignorance.
The “Person” is “IGNORANCE” itself.
In truth, there is no real/substantial person, beyond it being just one of the appearances.
YOU do not exist.
Illumination is to see there is no person.
Rather there is only divine light, and the person was just a form that was held onto, because of FALSE IDENTIFICATION.
So all holding on is false identification and ignorance.
Letting go, in all the chakric realms will free all your chakras.
Desire moves everything.
Desire/Longing for this transcendence and its movement is the upward movement of the being frequency itself.
It is the movement of “being” towards God frequency.
The God frequency is the highest frequency (tends to infinity).
When Being realizes it is the God frequency, then it allows everything and gives total freedom to all forms in the higher density realms, meaning total freedom, release and full understanding of all chakras.
The journey to God is a miraculous one/unimaginable one, you can never know how it will take shape.
If you know how it works, that means, that knowing is a dead structure, that needs to be made alive with divine light and freed.